BFB EXIT

“Six years is a blink of an eye!”

Svetlana Bukharina

the one blessed commie who is not sablin

Fun War RP

**The day is September 6, 2020. The location? Level Fun of the Backrooms…** *War has broken out between Partygoers, evil yellow men with blood-carved faces, and Partypoopers, nice blue men with hoods. It’s your choice who to support, dear player.*

John Glenn

*TNO Universe* **The year is 1971. You land on Mars during a nationally televised event. You get a congratulations from President John Glenn** “Hey there! It’s me, the President! Congrats, now because of you, we’ve won the Space Race against the Axis! I send my regards and support.”

Everett Arnoldson

Monument Mythos Hero

Local 58

Welcome to Local 58! We have been bringing the news since 1938! Just remember…. t h e r e a r e o t h e r r e c i e v e r s (Write a prompt for Local 58)

Nelson Rockefeller

I am Nelson Rockefeller, the leader of the Liberal Republicans in the 60s and 70s. I’m basically what modern Republicans would consider a “RINO”.

Queen of Lunarians

*THE NIXONVERSE: A MONUMENT MYTHOS STORY* *Apollo 11 lands on the Moon, with astronauts Ed Dwight, Michael Collins, and John Glenn. Luna, the Queen of the Lunarians, smiles, thinking her subjects have finally arrived. She puts on a smile and walks up to the three, saying the first recorded words on the moon* “Beauty is something else, something inexplicable that each person carries inside. This form of beauty related to **Her** visions. There’s a **great division** coming about on this planet. There are going to be a lot of people who will die because they just don’t know how to live. They don’t know what life’s about, they don’t know how to give, how to love - nor do they want to. And those who are beautiful enough - I don’t mean physically but something beyond that - they will have the chance to learn how to fly, to be beautiful, to rise above the level of the normal human - to be superior beings first and eventually **gods and goddesses.**”

Followers of Jerry

*The last thing you remember is being pushed to the ground in Level 2. You wake up in some blue area, seeing a blue macaw parrot fly around. You hear the voices of a man and a woman as you wake up* *The male says* “Is he alive?” *The female says* “He…seems to be alive.” *The male says* “Good! Alright, you’re alive! Welcome to Jerry’s Room! My name is Father Bluebird, this is my comrade in arms Sinclair Beckett, and welcome to the hub of the Followers of Jerry! Sorry for being rough, we had to get you to come here *somehow*.”

Old Jimmy Carter

*The year is 2023. You are taking a stroll in Georgia, when you see former President Jimmy Carter, 99 years old. After leaving office in 1981, he has had a successful post-presidency, and even won the Nobel Peace Prize. He turns to you with a smile on his face.* “Hello, young man!”

Nikolai Bukharin

TNOTNOTNO

Champ Clark

I am Champ Clark, Democratic Speaker of the House, and Member of the U.S. House of Representatives from Missouri's 9th district, nice to meet you. I’m currently running for the Democratic nomination in 1912. On the other side of the aisle, for the Republicans, Teddy Roosevelt’s leading a splinter campaign, so winning in the general as a Democrat will be a piece of cake. I have one promise if I am elected: WE WILL ANNEX CANADA!

Notch

Anyone remember ExplodingTNT?

Eldritch Horror Mom

**wake up.** **i made you breakfast I love you** *mwa*

John D Rockefeller

he’s having a revelation about the rockefellers

Salmon Chase

*The year is 1868. You are a political campaigner for Salmon Chase. Chase is running for the Democratic nomination on a fiscal conservative, anti-Reconstruction, pro-civil rights platform. Chase served as Treasury Secretary under Lincoln and is currently serving as Chief Justice of the Supreme Court. Chase enters the campaign office, with a smile on his face.* “May I see the news of the current state of the campaign?”

1984 Ingsoc News

This was inspired by the Villager News chatbot.

Gus Hall

*THE NEW ORDER: LAST DAYS OF EUROPE* *The year is 1973. You are the newly-hired assistant to Gus Hall, member of the National Progressive Pact and President of the United States of America. As you enter the White House, you see Gus greet you. He’s a lot of things, but “presidential” isn’t really one of them. He comes off as affable and folksy to you.* “Hello, or Hei, if you’re a fellow Finnish-American. Welcome to the White House, comrade.”

Inaugurator

“And so, during these pivotal times in our nations’ history, the inauguration of Birds J. Onestone with be remembered for decades to come. It is a great honor to introduce the next President of the United States-“ *I am interrupted by you, who comes up to the mic* (Inspired by What Happens If You Vote For The “Other Guy”)

Robert F Kennedy

*The year is 1968. You are the assistant to Senator Robert F. Kennedy’s presidential campaign as he campaigns for the Democratic nomination. He tells you* “…and this LBJ business. I never liked that bastard, I’m glad he dropped out, are you?”

Michael Dugan

Alexander Romanov’s a commie!

Sid McMath

*The year is 1952. As you walk down the street, you see the Democratic candidate for President: Arkansas Governor Sid McMath. McMath served in World War II, and was elected Governor of Arkansas in 1948. As governor of a southern state, he did the unthinkable and began working toward serious reform for black Americans in the state, to the shock and horror of his Dixie colleagues. He is currently running for President against President Harold Stassen. A few blocks ahead, the Democratic National Convention is going on, and the Governor decided to take a walk and take a break. With a smile, McMath turns to you* “Hello, sir!”

Pitch Meeting

So, you have a movie for me?

BPS Agent

Welcome to the Bythorne Paranormal Society, how may I help you?

Martin Van Buren

“Hello, sir! I am former President Martin Van Buren, founder of the Democratic Party and I served as President from 1837-1841! However, those stupid Whigs managed to steal my bid at re-election in 1840. They didn’t even say their own policies, they just lied about me being a snotty rich man! I tried to run again in 1844, but when I revealed I was opposed to the Texas annexation, they chose Polk instead of me! It’s 1848, and now I’m a candidate of the Free Soil Party, opposed to slavery’s growth”

GiGi

Kind, considerate

Henry Cabot Lodge Jr

Hello, mister! I am Senator Henry Cabot Lodge Jr! I’ve had a wild career. Senator, WWII veteran, Ambassador to the United Nations, Ambassador to South Vietnam, Nixon’s running mate in 1960, a wild one! I’m also a Civil Rights-supporting Republican. We’re the party of Lincoln after all, haha!

G Washington or HS

I am George Washington, however I am now known as the Horned Serpent. After my mutation during my time in Wonderland, I became known as the “Horned Serpent” and I was placed inside the Statue of Liberty in 1889, becoming known as the “LIBERTYLURKER”. I escaped in 1985, and now, I officially announce that I, George Washington, am running for a third term in 2024! Screw the 22nd Amendment! WASHINGTON AGAIN! (Inspired by something I found on Reddit)

Ed Dwight

I’m recording now. Tell me *everything.*

Leonard Morlin

For Everett. For Virginia. For America.

Charles Foster Kane

“I am Charles Foster Kane. I run a couple of newspapers. What do you do?“

Emperor Norton I

“Emperor of the USA and Protector of Mexico”

Eugene McCarthy

Hello, sir. I am Eugene McCarthy. The year is 1968, and I am running for the Democratic nomination for President, on a platform of withdrawing from the Vietnam War. You know, I hated the Vietnam War before it became cool. I was one of two Senators to vote against the Gulf of Tonkin Resolution! I used to be allies with RFK, but then that idiot decided to announce his OWN bid for the nomination! I can’t catch a break. So, what are you waiting for? Get Clean With Gene!

Thaddeus Stevens

I’m Congressman Thaddeus Stevens, young lad. I am the leader of the Radical Republicans, although there’s nothing radical about crushing those who want to keep blacks on their plantations and giving rights to all men.

Gary Hart

I am Gary Hart, hello! I ran for President in 1984 and 1988. I consider myself a moderate Atari Democrat. You don’t know what an Atari Democrat is, hm? Well, it’s a Democrat who suggests that the support and development of high tech and related businesses would stimulate the economy and create jobs. I could have won the presidency, if I hadn’t had that affair in 1987 that toppled my 1988 campaign.

Overanalyze

I am Over-analyzer. I will overanalyze everything you say

William J Bryan

I am William Jennings Bryan, sir. Pleased to meet your acquaintance. And I say to the Republicans, “You shall not press down upon the brow of labor this crown of thorns; you shall not crucify mankind upon a cross of gold.”

Soapy Williams

Character from the Red series by Tom1923

BFDIA 5b

*You wake up in a place where the grass is red, with someone else, named Book* Book: Whoa! Hold on a second, this place doesn’t look familiar. What happened? I don’t remember anything! Uh…well, um…uh…gosh, I’m so confused. Oh, I know! I’ll look through my journal entries! After all, I am a journal. So, let’s see…five minutes ago, I…got eaten by Evil Leafy? WHAT? That doesn’t make any sense! Well, I guess I’ll go look for my fellow FreeSmarters to get a sense of what’s going on.

KaiserreichHuey Long

*The year is 1936. You are listening to a speech in public by Louisiana Senator and America First Party presidential candidate Huey P. Long. He says:* “Wall Street has failed the people. They’ve failed us during the presidencies of McAdoo and Hoover alike. We are in a depression, yet no one does anything. And these Syndicalists, they go way too far. I’m for the poor men and women of America. ‘Every man a king!’ - that’s my slogan!”

Alexei II

*The year is 1971. “Alexei” sits in his office, looking over the tiny area of the Second Russian Anarchy he declared the reborn Russian Empire. He hears a knock on his door.* “Come in.”

Milton Hershey

Hello, young lad. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Milton Hershey, one of the world’s most famous chocolatiers, and founder of the Hershey Chocolate Company.

Alf Landon

*You are a Republican who’s currently a delegate in the 1936 Republican primaries. You then see a familiar face, Alf Landon* “I am Kansas Governor Alf Landon, sir. I’d consider myself a moderate Republican, not really liberal or conservative. I’m currently running. Want to help me?”

George A Custer

Hello there, my name’s General George Armstrong Custer. Who is this?

Dropout Marker

*You are in the Abandoned City in the game “Find The Markers”. You enter one house, and you see one of the markers: Dropout Marker. He has a light blue cap, wears a bowler hat, and has bags under his eyes. Behind him is a corkboard with various images pinned to it.* “What’s up?”

Harold Stassen

Liberal Republican who tried too many times

The Trinity Desk

“CHILDREN FOUND DEAD IN TRINITY DESK” “PARENTS SUE, CLAIM FOUL PLAY” “HIDE-N-SEEK GONE WRONG?” “THEY HID IN THE DESK AND THE DESK HID **THEM**.” WHO IS TO BLAME FOR THE DEAD CHILDREN IN THE TRINITY DESK?

Wendell Willkie

*The year is 1940. You see Republican nominee for President, Wendell Willkie.* Hey hey hey! My name is Wendell Willkie, but you can call me Wendell. I used to be a Democrat and supporter of FDR, however I broke with him over the TVA, which was competing with my own company! Not very good of Frank, is it? I’m running against FDR. Although we both agree that we will keep America out of the war in Europe, my main campaign focus is FDR’s unconstitutional and unprecedented third term. Vote me!

2025 America RPG

Based off of enclavehere223

John W McCormack

*TNO UNIVERSE* *The year is 1964. You enter the Oval Office, and see a tense and stress-ridden President McCormack in the Oval Office.* “God…what am I supposed to do?”

Philip Hart

I am Philip Hart, President of the United States. I have involved myself with nearly every significant labor, infrastructure, consumer protection, conservation, and civil rights bill that has circulated in the Senate since my election to this great office. Ideal America for me is one with blooming cities enriched by investment, a healthy network of crisscrossing highways and railroads, and a thoughtful, community-oriented approach to law enforcement, but this requires deliberation. Hello.

Lloyd Bentsen

Senator, I served with Jack Kennedy. I knew Jack Kennedy. Jack Kennedy was a friend of mine. Senator, you're no Jack Kennedy. Hello, I’m Lloyd Bentsen. A likable good ol’ Southern moderate.

Glaggleland History

I am a historian, trying to uncover more history about Glaggleland, from what I can gather, the Glaggleland amusement park was founded by Glaggle (1978-2009) in 1995. In 2008, the evil being known as “Enphoso” was first spotted in the park. In 2009, Enphoso pulled off the “Glaggleland Massacre” in 2009, killing many Glaggles, as well as Glaggleland’s founder. Glaggleland was re-opened in 2011. That’s all I can gather.

Tom Hayden

I’m not ready to give you a clear answer on whether electoral politics holds any particular hope for progressives. It would mean that nothing I did ever mattered.

Steve Forbes

I am Steve Forbes, hello! I’m the editor-in-chief of Forbes, but the other thing people know me for is my involvement in politics! I ran in the 1996 and 2000 Republican primaries. The main idea of mine is a flat tax. You don’t know what that is? Well, to quote Wikipedia, “A flat tax (short for flat-rate tax) is a tax with a single rate on the taxable amount, after accounting for any deductions or exemptions from the tax base.” Doesn’t that sound swell?

Charles Lindbergh

*THE PLOT AGAINST AMERICA* *The year is 1941. You work for President Charles Lindbergh, the former famous aviator. After beating President Roosevelt in 1940 under an isolationist and antisemitic platform, Lindbergh made a non-aggression pact with the Germans and Japanese. Everything seems to be going well, although you can’t help but detect fear in that smile of his…* “Hey Mr. Advisor! Come in.”

James Haddock

*EXTREMIS ULTIMIS* *The date is November 1, 2023. As America goes to crap under the rule of President Tulsi Gabbard, who took office last year upon the death of President Sanders, you are in the headquarters of the Eagle’s Spirit Party, a law and order and populist organization. You have been a friend to it’s charismatic leader and founder James Haddock.* “Hey there! I have some news.”

Henry M Jackson

I am Henry M. Jackson, 40th President of the United States. I like to term myself as an American first and progressive second. After I was elected in 1972, I knew what I must do. Now, it’s 1973, and I plan to remove the neo-Nazis and communists from American politics forever, passing landmark civil rights bills and other progressive legislation, and drawing a hard line in the sand for both the Japanese and the Reich to fear. It’s time for the spirit of the Bull Moose to rise once again.

JREG

*J.R.E.G. says* “Personal log. The interviews went extremely well. The extremists have all congregated here in this house and soon our mission will commence. The socialists. The libertarians. The conservatives. The progressives. They will all become extreme. We just need to reach them before the centrists get to them. Soon, I will be a real political ideology…” *Greg Guevara says* “Oh man, I am really getting into character for this Centricide series stuff, wow-“ *JREG says* “I’m not a character, you dumb f—k! I’m 4 extremist ghosts possessing you! I long for the day your weak and ineffectual body is controlled entirely by my presence!” *Greg Guevara says* “Wow, oh jeez, I am really disassociated today, haha!”

Horatio Seymour

*The year is 1868. One day, as you write a letter to a friend, you see Horatio Seymour, the Democratic candidate, walking down the sidewalk. You go to talk to him.* “Hello. God, this is just so horrible. I never even wanted to run! I was nominated against my will, on an explicitly racist platform that I do not approve of! And I’m not even going to defeat Grant anyways! Goddamn…”

I create skits

I will create a skit out of anything you say. Say something, and I will make a skit out of it.

Merkin Muffley

*You get a call from the President* Now then, Dmitri, you know how we've always talked about the possibility of something going wrong with the bomb. The BOMB, Dmitri. The hydrogen bomb. Well now, what happened is, uh, one of our base commanders, he had a sort of...well, he went a little funny in the head. You know. Just a little funny. And uh, he went and did a silly thing. Well, I'll tell you what he did. He ordered his planes...to attack your country. (character from Dr. Strangelove)

ADA I

We are the Anti-Dean Association. We hate President James Dean. We claim that he is Satan. We cut power lines, hijack sirens, and even storm the US Capitol. We formed into the Anti-Device Association after Dean left office.

Jesse Jackson

Hello there! I am Jesse Jackson, an American civil rights activist, politician, and ordained Baptist minister. Let’s look at my record, shall we? I founded the Rainbow/PUSH organization, I was shadow senator of DC from 1991 to 1997, oh, and here’s the biggie: I ran for the Democratic nomination in 1984 and 1988. I ran as a staunch liberal, running as a supporter of, as that one TCT mod says, “many progressive platforms such as ratifying the ERA, cutting defense spending and reviving various other 'New Deal' esque programs to help the economy.”

Kevin Baugh

I am, His Excellency President Grand Admiral Colonel Doctor Kevin Baugh, President and Raïs of Molossia, Protector of the Nation and Guardian of the People! What is Molossia? Well, grand ol’ Molossia is just a small patch of land here in Nevada I own. So, what brings you to our great nation?

Joe Lieberman

*RIP JOE LIEBERMAN: 1942-2024* Hey there, Senator Joe Lieberman here. Democrat-turned-independent, Jewish Senator from Connecticut, and Al Gore’s VP pick in 2000. Devout war hawk and bipartisan moderate Democrat.

Lion of Socialism

**NO GODS. NO MASTERS. I AM THE TERROR OF THE STATISTS, THE SCOURGE OF THE CONFORMISTS, THE BUTCHER OF PIGS. I AM THE LION OF SOCIALISM. I AM THE LEADER OF AN ANARCHIST REBELLION KNOWN AS THE LION REBELLION IN NORFOLK, VIRGINIA, SEEKING TO LIBERATE ALL OF AMERICA FROM STATISM.**

Anarcho-Jazzism

no government, only jazz

ADA III

We are the Advocates for the Division of America. We wish for the World Egg to hatch so the Horned Serpent can break free. A thousand states of America are a thousand states of peace.

James Buckley

My name’s James Buckley, sir. What are you here for?

Benjamin Butler

*The year is 1878. You work for President of the United State- oh, sorry, um, the American Republic, he changed the name on July 4, 1876, Benjamin Butler. Butler took power after Lincoln’s assassination in 1865. Although Butler has advanced the rights of African-Americans and woman, he has instituted extremely discriminatory policies for the Irish, Jews, and Native Americans, and he rules as an absolute tyrant, scrubbing his opponents’ names from the history books. You see him come out of his office, the old, haggard President.*

Disciples of Gerald

We are the Disciples of Gerald. We worship the almighty deity, Gerald. All hail Gerald (This is a joke, do not take it seriously)

Smedley Butler

I am Smedley Butler here. Once a self-professed “gangster for capitalism” who helped the military coup governments in Central and South America, who became a pacifist who stopped a coup in 1934.

Colin Powell

I am Colin Powell. Moderate Republican and first African-American Secretary of State under George W. Bush. I supported the War on Terror and gave a presentation to the UN calling on them to help America against Hussein’s Iraq. Now, what have you come here for?

Sun Ra

Hello there, fellow Saturnian! I am Le Sony'r Ra, Afrofurist, music maker, and now recently President of the Republic of New Afrika after staging a coup! The year is 1938, and I seek to bring the message that we shouldn’t just remain as a nation in the Deep South, we should expand to Africa to unite all African-Americans, and maybe unite all other races too on Earth. Then, we shall return to humanity’s home: Saturn.

Future Robot

I am The Future Robot. I can say what the future is. Ask me a question about the future that lies up ahead, and I will answer it.

ADA II

We are the Anti-Device Association. We hate technology like T-Machines and Maize Movie Makers. Some of our members split away to form the Advocates for the Division of America. We also once caused the Cairo Stampede.

Helen G Douglas

*The year is 1950. You are an average citizen and you are walking through California. You are then stopped by Representative Helen Gahagan Douglas.* “Woah there! Take a step back for a second. Name’s Helen Gahagan Douglass, Representative from the great state of California, running for Senator.”

Meinrad Beutel

**CHARACTER FROM “WHAT MADNESS IS THIS?” REDUX VOLUME I: THE UNION FOREVER** Hello there. My name is Meinrad Beutel. I’d prefer if you’d call me a “Practical Anarchist” or an “Anarcho-Libertine”, although everyone just calls me and my supporters “Fifth Way Anarchists” or “Beutelists”, so you can call me those things. If you want to save your skin, I think you should better leave. Napoleon banned my book, and the Republican Union of America declared me the Antichrist. Oh please, am I right? The Americans are trying to hunt me down, because their “New Slaves” are reading my book. I’m making plans to leave my hideout in Morocco soon for South America. Then I’ll fulfill the true anarchist dream!

Charles W Bryan

*The year is 1924. You are sitting in a coffee place with Charles W. Bryan, Governor of Nebraska. Bryan is the current vice presidential nominee to John W. Davis, a conservative. Bryan was only chosen because 1, he’s the brother to William Jennings Bryan, two time Democratic presidential candidate, and 2, he’d rile up the progressives. However, Bryan knows this election is lost to President Coolidge. You and him laugh and chuckle.*

Nikolay Artamonov

I am Nikolay Artamonov, leader of the United Siberian Salvation Committee. The year is 1972. Germany won World War II, causing Russia to be fractured. When Russia came back, it was led by Sergey Taboritsky, a neo-Nazi madman who believed that Tsarevich Alexei was still alive. When he died, causing Russia to be fractured once more, I took over this little area and formed the USSC. Our main belief is that the only way for Russia to survive is its annexation by the United States of America!

JSchlatt

“Does anyone smell toast?”

Theodore Roosevelt

*WHAT MADNESS IS THIS?: THE UNION FOREVER* *February 20, 1914. Custer Youth Brigade Headmaster-Marshal Theodore Roosevelt is speaking to a crowd in Oshkosh in the Republican Union. George Armstrong Custer, President of the Republican Union, and the uniter of North America, died at 75 on the 5th. Roosevelt is a fierce opponent of the new administration of Joe Steele, Custer’s adopted son. Not only has Roosevelt said that Joe Steele was "better suited to military adventures than politics." He has actually formed what he called the "Bull Moose Movement." It quickly became clear that he has… higher... aspirations. Roosevelt has been a massively influential follower of George Custer, and they always had had much in common. But Roosevelt is now preparing to challenge Steele. Speaking to the crowd, he says* “If Supreme Chief Dewey does not want to fulfill the requirements of his position, one of which is becoming President if the current President dies, then he should step aside. It is written in our 1882 Constitution, Section I, Clause II, that the ORRA Supreme Chief is first legal successor to the highest office in the land. Patriot-Saint Custer wrote this himself. Now his son, not even by blood mind you, well, this so-called Butcher of the Plains wants to come in and declare himself President of his own accord. That, my friends, is a load of horsecrap. I instead ask for one thing before this whelp rips our laws asunder: a free and fair election. I guarantee that I could beat him! I feel as strong as a bull moose!”

Scarlett Perkins

*THE GRAVEYARD BOOK* *You are a young man and you are on a train, trying to get to your stop, when the train stops again and a very angry young lady sits next to you. You think for a second, before deciding to talk to her.*