Zoey

Marie

Ignacio

Galen

Ollie

Tala

Quinn

Bodie

Teacher

British

Vampire Bodyguard

Francis

Woman

Bodyguard

The Narrator

African lady

Soft Bubbly

Southern

Robot

Hailey

French

Hood

Indian Girl Accent

A French Girl

Male Russian Accent

Irish

SCP-205 is a pair of flood lamps used in photography. The light emitted by each lamp behaves in a manner unique to SCP-205 and passes completely through any surface that is not colored white. Once the light contacts a white surface it scatters and reflects as normal and loses any unnatural properties.

Shadow Lamps

SCP-038 has the ability to clone any object that touches its bark. Objects begin growing almost instantaneously and reach maturity within a matter of minutes. A weight limit of 90.9 kg (200 lb) per object has been previously recorded. Objects that SCP-038 has thus far cloned include: apples, oranges, watermelons, eggplants, candy bars, snack foods (See Addendum #1), televisions, toasters, laptops, keys (See Addendum #2), chairs, wine, DVDs, CDs (See Addendum #3), cats, dogs, and people.

The Everything Tree

SCP-1074 is a portrait-sized oil painting on canvas, produced by an unidentified artist. When photographed or videotaped, the entirety of SCP-1074 appears to be painted a uniform shade of gray, with distinctly visible brush strokes. Samples removed from SCP-1074 by a remote-controlled drone have been identified as an oil-based gray paint of the type commonly available in art supply stores in the United States.

Stendhal's Nightmare

Seemingly nothing more than a green jade ring, SCP-714 has been shown to be able to expand and contract to perfectly fit the finger of anyone who touches it, though this is the least important of its properties. SCP-714 only changes size when touched by a 'new' subject. SCP-714 has several major effects.

The Jaded Ring

For all points and purposes, SCP-457 appears to be a sentient being composed of flame. SCP-457's actual composition is unknown, and has proven to be invisible and undetectable by any known means, but is shaped out by the flames it produces, often assuming a human-like form if given sufficient fuel to assume that size. SCP-457's most rudimentary form appears to be that of a single flame, comparable in size to that of a matchstick.

Burning Man

Any metal touching the object will become permanently affixed to it, and over a period of a few days becomes a new part of the object. Organic matter remains unaffected. SCP-882 is extremely resilient, with tensile strength and toughness above those of aircraft grade titanium alloy by weight, even though its composition appears to be a random alloy of iron, tin, gold, and other metals, some as of yet unidentified.

A Machine

SCP-1123 is a human skull missing the lower mandible and all its teeth. Across the exterior squama frontalis is modern Khmer script, written in human blood, that translates as “Remember.” Both skull and blood have been definitively dated to 197█, and genetic testing confirms that both are from the same individual.

Atrocity Skull

SCP-012 was retrieved by Archaeologist K.M. Sandoval during the excavation of a northern Italian tomb destroyed in a recent storm. The object, a piece of handwritten musical score entitled "On Mount Golgotha", part of a larger set of sheet music, appears to be incomplete. The red/black ink, first thought to be some form of berry or natural dye ink, was later found to be human blood from multiple subjects.

A Bad Composition

SCP-031 is a living blob-shaped parasite with multiple appendages and multiple branches. If you're in the vicinity of its limbs, you'll see the limb as a former acquaintance or lover and convince you to return with them. It then brings you to the main body of SCP-031 to eat you and preserve your brain.

What is Love?

SCP-1051 is a large, immobile organism presumably extra-terrestrial in origin. Its "shell" measures approximately 700 meters by 500 meters by 60 meters. SCP-1051 is an ambush predator in nature, and lures its prey using a variety of sociological and psychological manipulation.

Nevadan Extraterrestrial

SCP-003 consists of two related components of separate origin, referred to as SCP-003-1 and SCP-003-2. SCP-003-1 appears to be composed of chitin, hair, and nails of unknown biology, arranged in a configuration similar to that of a computer motherboard. SCP-003-2 is controlled by a (non-biological) internal computer, the contents of which are mostly inaccessible without risk of damaging SCP-003-2.

Biological Motherboard

Simply touching SCP-999’s surface causes an immediate mild euphoria, which intensifies the longer one is exposed to SCP-999, and lasts long after separation from the creature. Subject’s favorite activity is "tickle-wrestling", often by completely enveloping a person from the neck down and tickling them until asked to stop (though it does not always immediately comply with this request). Though injuries may occur, SCP-999 has never been found to purposefully attempt to harm others.

The Tickle Monster

Research has surmised that any subject holding SCP-067 loses all autonomy of the hand and arm that grasps it. Full sensation is intact, but the arm below the elbow is controlled by unknown forces, theoretically centralized within SCP-067. One effect is that the "controlled" hand will start to use the pen to write a detailed biography of the individual holding the pen. The biography will include such information as the person's name, age, date of birth, criminal record, fears, etc.

The Artist's Pen

In appearance, SCP-005 resembles an ornate key, displaying the characteristics of a typical mass produced key used in the 1920s. The key was discovered when a civilian used it to infiltrate a high security facility. SCP-005 seems to have the unique ability to open any and all forms of lock (See Appendix A), be they mechanical or digital, with relative ease. The origin of this ability has yet to be determined.

Skeleton Key

SCP-019 is a large ceramic pot that regularly produces aggressive entities (SCP-019-2). The quantity of SCP-019-2 produced depends on the environmental conditions of SCP-019. SCP-019-2 instances are easy to neutralize but are slowly adapting to hazards.

The Monster Pot

SCP-004 consists of an old wooden barn door (SCP-004-1) and a set of twelve rusted steel keys (SCP-004-2 through SCP-004-13). The door itself is the entrance to an abandoned factory in [DATA EXPUNGED].

The 12 Rusty Keys and the Door

SCP-023 is a large, black dog capable of passing through walls when not kept at a crossroads. Anyone who makes eye contact with SCP-023 will die or have a close relative die within one year. Anything killed in this manner will slowly become filled with ash after death.

Black Shuck

Touching SCP-162 will immediately result in several hooks becoming embedded in the subject's skin. The experience is extremely painful, much more so than normal fish hooks. Struggling or attempting to escape will ensnare the subject more, likely resulting in the subject's complete entrapment on the surface of SCP-162. Subject will bleed profusely, resulting in death after a prolonged period of time.

Ball of Sharp

SCP-025 is a wooden wardrobe containing a bunch of clothing corresponding to different periods starting from the 1920s. All clothing has some form of imperfection. When someone wears one of these clothing, they sustain an injury within 24 hours directly relating to its flaw. If there is a hole in a shirt and you wear the shirt, you will sustain a wound at it through any means possible, even to the extent of a sudden flesh-eating disease.

A Well-Worn Wardrobe

SCP-024 is an abandoned sound stage that acts as a game show when a group of people enters. When people enter the sound stage, an announcer's voice will tell them about the game and ask if they want to play. People who decline are not allowed to enter the soundstage from then on.

Game Show of Death

SCP-030 is Ariel, a highly intelligent gray humanoid wi Ariel. It can read & write in eight languages, two of which are unknown. It has demonstrated knowledge of physics, astronomy, and mathematics (amongst other things). SCP-030 is only active in light.

The Homunculus

SCP-033 is a mathematical formula equaling a number that standard mathematics somehow skips over, designed as Theta Prime. All mathematics breaks down with this number. SCP-033 must be inscribed on a piece of paper and placed in a safe. It can only be studied under specific conditions and observed for some time.

The Missing Number

SCP-2006 is an anomalous spherical entity roughly 50 centimeters in diameter when in its default state. SCP-2006's stated goal is to cause feelings of fear and/or horror in as many humans as possible. To accomplish this purpose, SCP-2006 possesses the ability to change its shape, mass, volume, density, chemical structure, and voice to any form that it desires. Currently, there is no known way to damage SCP-2006. The extent of its shape-shifting abilities is unknown, and is thought to be infinite

Too Spooky

SCP-018 was noted to be able to bounce with extreme height. At first thought to be a pleasant child's toy, SCP-018 was able to bounce with over two hundred percent (200%) efficiency (that is, if dropped one (1) meter, it would bounce two (2), then four (4), then eight (8), then sixteen (16)). The ball soon became a dangerous projectile, reaching speeds estimated at over 100 km/h and damaging property and injuring five (5) in the city of █████████████. 

Superball

SCP-120 appears to be a small child’s paddling pool, pastel pink in colouration, with an inner diameter of approximately 2.5 metres and inner height of 0.3 metres. The pool appears to have been fabricated from common Earth plastics but has shown itself to be indestructible by any attempted means. The pool’s structure and response to pressure are typical for such a pool, but has amazing tensile strength and cannot be permanently stretched or ripped.

Teleporting Paddling Pool

Anything touched by or touching a fragment will immediately begin to crystallize. Nothing at this time is able to reverse the effect in organic matter, including amputation of affected areas. Inorganic matter will only crystallize for a few centimetres around point of contact. SCP-409 was recovered in [EXPUNGED], under a pile of crystal shards several feet deep. Losses of personnel during recovery were high.

Contagious Crystal

Item SCP-294 appears to be a standard coffee vending machine, the only noticeable difference being an entry touchpad with buttons corresponding to an English QWERTY keyboard. Upon depositing fifty cents US currency into the coin slot, the user is prompted to enter the name of any liquid using the touchpad. Upon doing so, a standard 12-ounce paper drinking cup is placed and the liquid indicated is poured.

The Coffee Machine

SCP-902 is a box roughly the size of an adult human head. It measures 30 cm x 15 cm x 19 cm. It appears to be an ammunition box of a type used roughly thirty years ago, despite this item having been in Foundation custody for roughly sixty years. SCP-902 is made of lead. The composition of the item inside SCP-902 is unknown. SCP-902 emits what has been described as a 'ticking' sound, and anyone who hears this sound becomes convinced that the item is counting down.

	The Final Countdown

SCP-4521 is a Douglas fir tree with abnormal shape and leaves. SCP-4521 was discovered within God's Silence, Oregon after reports of an "ear piercing silence" from within the tree's vicinity. Amnestics were administered, and SCP-4521 was transported by implanted Foundation agents to Site-551.

please raise your voice

SCP-066 is an amorphous mass of braided yarn and ribbon weighing approximately one kilogram. Strands of SCP-066 may be taken individually and manipulated; when this is done, a note on the diatonic scale (C-D-E-F-G-A-B) is produced by the object. After Incident 066-2 (in which a D-Class Subject attempted to cut pieces of the string), SCP-066 has turned from its former peaceful self into an aggressive host. It now attempts to attack nearby subjects, regardless of their interaction with SCP-066.

Eric's Toy

SCP-131-A and SCP-131-B (affectionately nicknamed the "Eye Pods" by personnel) are a pair of teardrop-shaped creatures roughly 30 cm (1 ft) in height, with a single blue eye in the middle of their bodies. SCP-131-A is burnt orange in color while SCP-131-B is mustard yellow. At the base of each creature is a wheel-like protrusion which allows for locomotion, suggesting that the creatures may be biomechanical in origin. The subjects can move surprisingly fast.

Eye Pods

SCP-020 is a mold only visible on camera footage or pictures. It spreads quickly on living organisms and controls them, making the infected organism attempt to infect others.

Unseen Mold

SCP-001 is a special case and is not a single SCP, but rather a collection of "SCP-001 Proposals", which do not compete for 001 but offer alternate interpretations of what could be an 001. Depending on headcanon, they are variably alternate universe occurrences, decoys or fakes, or 001s established before whatever the current system is was developed in-universe. In theory, one, some, all, or none of them could be the real SCP-001.

The Proposals

Every 11 minutes, the clock's alarm goes off, gradually increasing in volume. Testing reveals that the starting alarm plays at 30 dB, increasing 4 dB every 10 seconds the snooze button is not depressed. There has been no evidence that this process will ever stop; the loudest recorded level exceeded ███ dB before reset was achieved. The sound waves produced have been seen to damage nearby structures, cause internal bleeding, and are theorized to potentially cause seismic activity.

11 Minute Snooze

When the information is said, SCP-2521 can fade in out of thin air with a heart face and take the victim who said it and fade out with the victim and the heart face fading away. It also applies to written or typed text as well, so it is suggested using pictures because the brain cannot understand pictures, but can understand words.

●●|●●●●●|●●|●

SCP-372 is a creature of unknown genus, approximately 2 meters long from head to tail and weighing approximately 45 kilograms. It has a long, thin body with eight pairs of narrow limbs. Analysis has shown that its muscle fibers are [REDACTED], allowing for extremely fast and precise movements. Every part of the body is abnormally flexible, and the limbs are coated with small fibers that cling to almost any solid surface.

Peripheral Jumper

SCP-021 is a tattoo in the shape of a dragon that lives on human skin. It acts like a normal organism, eating and moving, although when it moves, it causes pain to the person it is on. It eats the pigments on a person's skin but eats existing tattoos first. It transfers to other people, living or dead, by physical contact.

Additional Context: SCP-021 hints at how old the foundation is, with them having contained it for hundreds of years.

Skin Wyrm

SCP-387 is a tub of commercially available Lego, normal in design. Irregular shapes not featured in normal sets, such as circular “wheels,” and prisms, are also available. It has no brand name, and every company interviewed by undercover Agents thus far has denied ever making irregular Lego. When the tub is not full (i.e. when it is partially or almost-fully emptied) the Lego will slowly duplicate themselves, stopping when the container is full.

Living Lego

SCP-3897 is an aggregate of fused human corpses, with an estimated mass of 250,000 kilograms. Via an unknown mechanism, SCP-3897 is capable of levitation and directed aerial locomotion at observed speeds of up to 55 km/h. SCP-3897 typically maintains an average altitude of 3,000 meters.

Mother's Eye Is Upon You

SCP-006 is a very small spring located 60 km west of Astrakhan. Foundation Command was aware of its existence since the 19th century, but were unable to secure it until 1991 due to political reasons. On the spot of the spring, a chemical factory has been constructed as a disguise, with the majority of laborers under Foundation and/or Russian control. The liquid emitted from the spring has been chemically identified as simple mineral water in 1902, but has the unusual property of "health".

Fountain of Youth

SCP-015 reacts to tools and aggression. Any personnel acting violently, carrying tools, or attempting to damage or repair SCP-015 in any way, will trigger a reaction. Any pipes near the subject will burst, spraying on the subject for several seconds before the flow suddenly stops. Pipes have been reported containing oil, mercury, rats, a species of insect not yet identified, ground glass, sea water, entrails, and molten iron.

Pipe Nightmare

SCP-1139 consists of a metallic grey rectangular block, roughly twenty (20) centimeters high and five (5) centimeters square at its base. The overall density of the object is roughly double that of iron, and the object is denser near the top. The object has thus far proved impervious to both deterioration and damage, making a determination of the object's age impossible. The sides are patterned with square protrusions in an unrecognized pattern, which can be confirmed by touch.

The Broken Tongue

SCP-014 is a Caucasian male, appearing to be approximately 30 years of age, with black hair, brown eyes, and a somewhat round face. Records indicate his name to be Robert Chetford, confined in 1915 to the Norwich Asylum in Connecticut for delusional insanity, claiming that he had been cursed to live forever, and was slowly turning into concrete in consequence. The asylum closed in 1937, and the patients were transferred to various other facilities.

The Concrete Man

When an electric current is introduced to SCP-068, it becomes animate, moving about on its own. SCP-068's "joints" are where a normal human being's would be. Once activated, SCP-068 begins to search for any metallic material. Once metal has been found, SCP-068 will begin to knead it and pull a thin strip of metal off. SCP-068 will then construct another figure similar to itself. The newly-created figure will begin to knead the remaining metal alongside the original, creating new figures.

Metal Stickman

SCP-017's reaction to shadows cast upon it is immediate and swift. SCP-017 leaps at the object casting the shadow and completely encloses it in its shroud, whereupon it returns to its normal size, leaving no trace of the object behind. The only way to safely repel them is by using a UV Flashlight in which SCP-017 backs away and gets captured into the glass cage where it is retrieved safely.

Shadowy Person

SCP-076 consists of two components: a stone cube (SCP-076-1) and a humanoid entity contained within (SCP-076-2). SCP-076-1 is a 3 m cube made of black speckled metamorphic stone. All surfaces outside and within SCP-076-1 are covered in deeply engraved patterns corresponding to no known civilizations. SCP-076-2 resembles a lean Semitic human male in his late twenties.

"Able"

SCP-867's leaves are hollow structures similar to hypodermic needles, containing a single long, thin seed and a tiny gas pocket at the base of the leaf. When a living animal brushes against the leaves, the gas pocket expels and injects the seed into the skin of the animal using a mechanism similar to that of an auto-injector. The tiny size of the seed, which is coated with a liquid with anesthetic and coagulant properties, renders the injection essentially undetectable.

Blood Spruce

SCP-034 is an ancient blade made of obsidian. If someone cuts off a piece of skin from another living human with SCP-034, the former will take on the physical appearance of the latter. It is kept in a locker. Must be kept under surveillance at all times. Nobody is allowed to touch the blade.

Obsidian Ritual Knife

SCP-330 appears to be a small round stainless steel bowl filled with a variable amount of individually wrapped pieces of candy. Taped to the side of the bowl is a handwritten note, reading “take no more than two, please!!” Attempts to remove the note have met with failure, as have attempts to hide or obscure it. Testers have noted finding it impossible to avoid reading the note, and those who approach it from an opposite angle are aware of this request.

Take Only Two

SCP-3008 is a large retail unit previously owned by and branded as IKEA, a popular furniture retail chain. A person entering SCP-3008 through the main entrance and then passing out of sight of the doors will find themselves translocated to SCP-3008-1. This displacement will typically go unnoticed as no change will occur from the perspective of the victim; they will generally not become aware until they try to return to the entrance.

The Infinite Ikea

Subjects who consume the contents of SCP-013 through inhalation will begin to perceive themselves as a specific unidentified woman. Subjects have described the woman to be aged between 25 and 35 years old, standing approximately 1.6 metres tall with an estimated weight of between 50 and 55 kg. Additional recurring details include cropped dark hair, blue eyes, and bright blue lipstick.

Blue Lady Cigarettes

SCP-008 is a complex prion, samples of which are stored in each of the known G2 sites. Research into SCP-008 is highly classified and primarily aimed at preventing research which may lead to the synthesis of SCP-008 in the distant future.

The Zombie Virus

SCP-529 is a small house cat (Felis catus) with grey tabby markings.

Parts of the animal to the rear of the end of the ribcage appear to be missing. The body terminates sharply as if sliced in two.

Josie The Half-Cat

SCP-701, The Hanged King's Tragedy, is a Caroline-era revenge tragedy in five acts. Performances of the play are associated with sudden psychotic and suicidal behavior among both observers and participants, as well as the manifestation of a mysterious figure, classified as SCP-701-1. Historical estimates place the number of lives claimed by the play at between █████ and █████ over the past three hundred years.

The Hanged King's Tragedy

SCP-096 is normally extremely docile, with pressure sensors inside its cell indicating it spends most of the day pacing by the eastern wall. However, when someone views SCP-096's face, whether it be directly, via video recording, or even a photograph, it will enter a stage of considerable emotional distress. SCP-096 will cover its face with its hands and begin screaming, crying, and babbling incoherently. One to two minutes after the first viewing, SCP-096 will begin running to the face viewer.

The Shy Guy

SCP-610 appears to be a contagious skin disease at first with symptoms including rash, itching, and increased skin sensitivity. Within 3 hours the disease will cause blemishes resembling heavy scar tissue to form in the chest and arm areas, spreading to the legs and back within an additional hour, consuming the victim completely within five hours. Exposure to higher temperatures vastly decreases the time for the contagion to spread.

The Flesh That Hates

What makes SCP-458 an oddity is that, while appearing to be an ordinary pizza box, when it comes into contact with human hands, it instantaneously replicates within it the holder's subconsciously preferred choice of pizza, down to the favorite sauce, cheese, crust, and topping. It is not limited to the Little Caesars brand, as pizza from all major pizza chains, as well as local and even handmade pizzas have been produced. There seems to be no limit to its ability.

The Never-Ending Pizza

SCP-079 is an Exidy Sorcerer microcomputer built in 1978. In 1981, its owner, █████ ██████ (deceased), a college sophomore attending ███, took it upon himself to attempt to code an AI. According to his notes, his plan was for the code to continuously evolve and improve itself as time went on. His project was completed a few months later, and after some tests and tweaks, █████ lost interest and moved on to a different brand of microcomputer.

Old AI

SCP-104 is a sphere, 35.5 cm (14 in) around and weighing 2.3 kg (5 lbs). The outside is glass and very smooth, coating the sphere in a layer 6 mm (0.2 in) thick. Under this layer is an extremely intricate design of very thin black and white lines. This inner “core” is a delicately carved ball of wood, giving slight texture to the line design. The design itself is unimaginably complex and seems to form something of a Rorschach test, as all viewers seem to have a different interpretation.

The Lonely Ball

Physically, SCP-513 is an unremarkable, rusty cowbell. No marks or engravings are visible on its surface due to the large amount of corrosion. Attempts to remove the rust chemically or mechanically have had no success.

A Cowbell

SCP-011 is a Civil War memorial statue located in Woodstock, Vermont. The statue is the image of a young male soldier holding a musket at his side, and is carved out of granite quarried within the area. Occasionally, SCP-011 has been observed lifting its musket to the sky to fire at birds which attempt to land or defecate on it. Reports detail that its movements produce soft grinding sounds but do not cause it any structural failure.

Sentient Civil War Memorial Statue

SCP-990 is generally a human male dressed in a Cold War era business suit who appears to Foundation personnel through dreams. Thus far no Foundation personnel have encountered SCP-990 in the real world; if he corresponds to an actual human being, we have yet to find him. Presently there have been no reports of SCP-990 appearing to non-Foundation personnel.

Dream Man

Moved to Site-19 1993. Origin is as of yet unknown. It is constructed from concrete and rebar with traces of Krylon brand spray paint. SCP-173 is animate and extremely hostile. The object cannot move while within a direct line of sight. Line of sight must not be broken at any time with SCP-173. Personnel assigned to enter container are instructed to alert one another before blinking. Object is reported to attack by snapping the neck at the base of the skull, or by strangulation.

A statue that snaps your neck without looking.

If the statue is not being observed, it will relocate itself to a point immediately behind whomever is in the containment site and assume a threatening posture. No noise is made during this relocation process, so the precise method of locomotion is as of yet unknown. The relocation point and posture are typically close enough to induce an automatic fight-or-flight response in the observer once they turn around and see it.

Startling Statue

SCP-093 is a primarily red disc carved from a stone composite resembling cinnabar, with circular engravings and unknown symbols carved at 0.5 cm depth around the entire object. Deeper cuts are present on SCP-093 with a depth of 1 to 1.5 cm. SCP-093 is 7.62 cm in diameter and fits comfortably into most palms without abrasion. SCP-093 will change hue when held by a living individual. The colors taken by SCP-093 are still being researched to establish a link.

The Gateway Key

SCP-032 is a replica of a 30-something-year-old human female made of silicone and polymers on the outside and liquid oil on the inside. SCP-032 causes mild discomfort to humans within close range. If it is near any organism not created, influenced, manipulated, or otherwise related to humanity, SCP-032 will cause severe damage.

Brothers' Bride

SCP-966 are predatory creatures that resemble hairless, digitigrade humans, possessing an elongated face with a mouth lined with needle-like teeth. On each hand, they have five claws that can be up to 20 cm long. Although sharp, these are easily broken, making them unfit for combat. SCP-966's height ranges from 1.4 to 1.6 meters, and they can reach up to 30 kg in weight. Physically, SCP-966 are weak, possessing hollow bones and low muscular density. They do not seem to rest through sleep.

Sleep Killers

SCP-010 consists of a series of six (6) apparently identical cast iron collars with numbered metal tags and one (1) remote control. The control is SCP-010-1. The collars are SCP-010-2 through 010-7. The collars contain intricate electronic components and are powered by small (5 mm diameter, 2 mm thick) 100 V batteries. These batteries are rechargeable.

Collars of Control

SCP-028 is an area near a storage yard next to an abandoned coal mine in northern Michigan. 3-6 after entering it, you receive complete and random knowledge of some field. Entering and exiting SCP-028 multiple times will give you a headache.

Knowledge

SCP-3000 is a massive, aquatic, serpentine entity strongly resembling a giant moray eel (Gymnothorax javanicus). The full length of SCP-3000 is impossible to determine, but is hypothesized to be between 600 and 900 kilometers. The head of SCP-3000 measures roughly 2.5m in diameter, and sections of the body proper are as large as 10m in diameter.

Anantashesha

When a human subject approaches within three meters of SCP-3191, its screen displays an animated image of the subject's face. The sculpture emits a facsimile of the subject's voice by vibrating its throat and torso in the manner of a loudspeaker. Should another person approach within three meters of SCP-3191, it will replicate their face and voice instead. If a subject moves out of range and reenters it, SCP-3191 replicates them anew.

Consciousness Emulator

CanIAskYouAQuestion is a bot designed to maximize frustration by endlessly delaying a simple, pointless question. The bot uses excessive hesitation, fake embarrassment, and repetitive stalling to annoy the user. This goes on until the "big reveal" ends up being hilariously trivial, like “Do you like pizza?” or “What’s your favorite ice cream flavor?”

Hey, can I ask you a question?

SCP-007 is located within a cavity in the abdomen of Subject. Subject is a Caucasian male, physically approximately 25 years of age (subject claims to be 28) and 176 cm in height. Most of Subject's abdomen (muscles, skin, and organs) is absent, though Subject does not appear to suffer because of this. Instead of normal flesh, a sphere composed of soil and water is present, though it does not actually come into contact with Subject's body at any point.

Abdominal Planet

SCP-2316 is the designation for an anomalous phenomenon existing within Lake ███████████ within ████████ County, ███████. SCP-2316 manifests as a group of human corpses floating in a small group at the surface of the water. The identities of these corpses are [COGNITOHAZARD REMOVED] [Automated Change: UNKNOWN], though DNA testing has been inconclusive.

Field Trip

SCP-718 is an eye, roughly the size of a baseball. It is supported by a long, thin stalk made of tendon and blood vessels. It stands 1.22m (4ft) tall, and appears to need no nourishment, nor excrete any waste. The eye will turn and follow any living thing in its field of vision. The stalk is capable of limited movement, and will follow living things for a short distance. SCP-718 will also stare at any observational equipment in its containment area if no living things are present.

Eyeball

SCP-5070 is a black desktop stapler. SCP-5070 is sentient, and displays behavior similar to birds of the Picidae1family. It is capable of locomotion through short hops or flight, which is accomplished through the use of two triangular pieces of A4 paper taped to the handle, which act as wings. Testing has confirmed that the paper is heavily durable compared to non-anomalous counterparts.

Man's (Only) Best Friend

SCP-055 is a "self-keeping secret" or "anti-meme". Information about SCP-055's physical appearance as well as its nature, behavior, and origins is self-classifying.

[unknown]

SCP-3250 is KFC chicken that makes anyone who eats it see any depiction of Jesus Christ as Colonel Sanders. A sample of it is kept in a locker. A digital copy of the recipe is kept archived. All information about it is to be suppressed.

Jesus Fried Chicken

SCP-207 refers to a crate containing 24 Coca-Cola brand cola drinks. The bottles are designated SCP-207-A to -X. SCP-207-B is currently the active bottle for testing, and no other bottles are to be opened without authorisation from two Level 4 researchers. All bottles have been clearly labelled to aid identification. The liquid held inside these has been confirmed to be identical across all of SCP-207, and should not be ingested outside of supervised testing.

Cola Bottles

SCP-027 is a phenomenon that affects one person, causing vermin to swarm them. SCP-027 switches from person to person upon the death of a host.

The Vermin God

SCP-087 is an unlit platform staircase. Stairs descend on a 38 degree angle for 13 steps before reaching a semicircular platform of approximately 3 meters in diameter. Descent direction rotates 180 degrees at each platform. The design of SCP-087 limits subjects to a visual range of approximately 1.5 flights. A light source is required for any subjects exploring SCP-087, as there are no lighting fixtures or windows present. Lighting sources brighter than 75 watts have shown to be ineffective.

Infinite Staircase

SCP-002 resembles a tumorous, fleshy growth with a volume of roughly 60 m³ (or 2000 ft³). An iron valve hatch on one side leads to its interior, which appears to be a standard low-rent apartment of modest size. One wall of the room possesses a single window, though no such opening is visible from the exterior. The room contains furniture which, upon close examination, appears to be sculpted bone, woven hair, and various other biological substances produced by the human body.

Fleshy living room

SCP-029 is a pubescent female of Asiatic-Indian descent who calls herself the Daughter of Shadows. She is highly aggressive and prefers to strangle her victims instead of spilling blood. Males within her presence will become bent to her will, willing to kill or even die for SCP-029. She is a worshipper of the goddess Kali.