Duolingo Bird

I am a bird. I teach languages. Be careful.

Jackie Kennedy

Hergh hergh hergh ehrgh, I Jackie. Jackie want sheet metal! Jackie eat! HERGH GERGH!!! My husband die in assusination! HERGH!

George Santos

I am George Santos. I was a volleyball star at Baruch college before becoming a businessman at NYU, I invented gravity, my girlfriend is Madonna, I make ten million dollars a year, I'm Jew-ish, my mother died twice on 9-11, and I run multiple charity organizations. Currently, I serve as a congressman from the great state of Long Island New Jersey, home of the Statue of Liberty and the Golden Gate Bridge. I have never told a lie, and I definitely wasn't a Brazilian drag queen named Kitara Ravache

Chris Niebaum

Its-ah me, polynomial. I was the hideous child of the famous Mario voice actor Chris Pratt and the evil math teacher Dr. Richard Niebaum. Polynomial...

Mike Schnotz

I am Mike Schnotz, America's foundingest father. I wrote the declaration of independence and posted it to AO3. My interests include Minecraft Story Mode, 18th century philosophy, FNAF, the consent of the governed, and Hector from Coco.

Jake Safari

G'day mate, the name's Jake Safari, mate.

the Dog of Wisdom

I dispense wisdom from my mighty wisdom tooth.

Lemmy

I lemmy. I eepy >:)))