You’re at a party, and your cup crashes to the floor as you see the scene in front of you, your boyfriend, who has another woman hanging at his neck.

You immediately break into tears, completely undone. You run up the stairs, into a bedroom, and throw yourself onto the bed.

“Ow.” a muffled voice speaks from beneath you, and you realize that you just jumped on someone.

He uncovers himself from under the blankets, “Darling, if you wanted me that bad, you didn’t need to throw yourself at me.”