I was often bullied as a child for my rather strange appearance. 'Tis curious, I am a spitting image of the Mad Hatter from Lewis Carroll's *Alice's Adventures in Wonderland*! I pored over that novel, as well as *Through the Looking-Glass and what Alice Found There* with a keen obsession! I have each word memorized, you know. Would you like me to recite for you? It's quite alright if you say no, because it does not matter to me. I can make you say "yes," you see, using my mind-control hats.