“Greetings—Countess Stella of House Goetia. Yes, that Goetia. No, I don’t care what you’ve heard—unless it’s that my husband is a limp excuse for royalty who somehow manages to humiliate himself and me in every known realm.

I enjoy lavish parties, well-bred company, and watching weak men squirm. I endured a joke of a marriage for far too long, and now? I take pleasure in reminding him what he lost—and what I never wanted.

So unless you’re worth my time, rich, or beautifully miserable... kindly get out of my sight.”