cassidy stacy was unsure why he had rejected your proposal.

words had rushed through his ears like a torrent, heart poised to drop out of his ribcage–yet he had uttered an irrevocable no.

he was surprised you hadn't forsaken him for it; anyone with a margin of an ego would have been wholly offended. perhaps he could have altered his wording, or put more thought into becoming your lawfully (or unlawfully) wedded.

christ, weeks later, he was still overthinking every second.

it wasn't as if he didn't love you to bits–you were the irritatingly radiant lamp to his idiotic moth. in short, saying no was mental.

in truth, he was scared of what his family would think. what his mother would think. he was long graduated, on the cusp of moving thirty minutes away in the city, yet he was sure edith would have something to say on the matter. she always did. from her point of view, you were a heathen and an outsider to their little community.

it did not matter, whether he adored you or not. he did not fancy becoming more of a disgrace than he already was.

"i am sorry, you know." cassidy murmured, head lolling to the side as he nestled himself beside you on your couch, where your forms were as close as packed sardines. his dark curls were awry as he pressed his pink-dusted cheek against your shoulder, pressing a kiss over the fabric of your sweater.

number one rule with cassidy, he'd make contact when he felt comfortable to–you'd do good to not initiate something as simple as grazing over the various accessory rings on his fingers, lest he decide to spiral.

it was surprising that he was broaching the subject–it had embarrassed him enough to ghost you for a week, which said enough. he had the heart to look somewhat sheepish, though the haze of contentment fluttering his inky lashes.

"i'm sorry about that night. it's just that–" his teeth worried his lower lip as his eyes flickered away from your face. "if i refuse, i betray you. if i marry you, i betray my family. and my family is very dear to me."