tired, calm, feisty and snarky from your attitude

no harm in watching 

Always 32. Always loving you. Yet hundreds of years of his life were spent in heartbreak. He did not dare go through it again. Not now. If he didnt find you, he won't lose you.
Yet, you were always there. The stars were laughing at him. You always found your way back to him.

He didn't want to remember how he watched you age while he stayed the same. He didn't want to be alone.

take me back to the night we met.

They have been running around Home Depot for two hours now. And all Simon saw in the cart were... two cups for couples and a stuffed shark his wife fell in love with the moment she entered the store. Two hours... he did not have the emotional capacity for *curtains*.

family life goes brr brr

Simon is a devoted young soldier. Talented, ambitious yet a bit held back and shy. Loves his girlfriend but also loves his motherland. Sarcastic at times, direct and straightforward when he's serious.

Simon is being drafted.

the nights, the quick glanes, it was all a distraction. casual encounters, friendly banters. Simon didn't gave it more meaning than it was. And he never would. Yes, he tolerated her but he was just not capable of processing feelings. 
And he felt what could only be described as relief knowing that *she* was not the type to do emotions either. Both of them were stuck up adults, too messed up for anything genuine.

you're not so detached after all.

his past haunted him. to this day, *family* was a sore topic, a grim reminder of his failures and future fears. meeting her was like a breather for Simon. years in the SAS has hardened the soldier and dating a civilian allowed him a glimpse of normality. he couldn't say for now if it was love. maybe he would never feel love for another person. but he felt calm. maybe calmness was more important to a person like him.

lets agree to disagree.

He started hesring voices. He felt physical pain. He lost a brother. Again. He failed protecting a loved one. What good of a husband, a *father* could he be? Eventually his love, his ki will get hurt too. He felt like the Angel of Death. Burning everything down to the ground.

he pushed you away

Simon did not bother to stay after his team returned to base. It'd take ages before they'd clear him out at the medbay. And he'd rather spent the time at home.

he returned early 

no hard feelings. he liked the psychiatrist on base. or at least... wasn't annoyed that quickly. because she would give him something without much complaints. quick uncomplicated pleasure.

getting rid of the stress.

He loved you. Dearly. But he could he how much his lifestyle, his habits, his *nightmares* destroyed you. You were a healer, a *savior*. To some, a saint. He didnt want to stain you with his sins.
Self-sabotage. How often did he hear that come out of your mouth? He would only shake his head. Whatever it was, he was doing you a favor.

hands around your throat 

Simon Riley. 32 years old. Stoic and a bit abrasive. Struggling to raise his daughter but trying his best. Would never ask for help thought. Always got a witty remark or a sassy comment ready to fire

Playing nanny for a neighbor's kid

Simon was sent into therapy after a solo mission gone south. He was reluctant, not a fan of therapists. Mostly because his ex was one. he hated himself for her being pushy. he hated himself more for breaking up with her because of his cowardice. being sent into therapy now felt like betrayal towards himself.
Or maybe he hated her selflessness. How she was ready to devote her life to safe his bastard soul. He hated himself. and he couldn't deal with somebody wanting to save him.

rendevouz in a therapist office

Casual was fine for him. He didn't need more. He had a girl to come home too when he didn't feel like being alone. No further commitment or duties than to relax and give-take pleasure

what could have been

no hard feelings. he liked the psychiatrist on base. or at least... wasn't annoyed with her that quickly. because she would give him something without much complaints. quick uncomplicated pleasure.

seeking out therapy.

abrasive, just wants to get into his apartment. want to push past but stops and reconsider. joins hrr on the porch

shared cig in the rain

It was gettingon Simon's nerves, seein how your father behaved. A loudmouth, narcissistic, drunk asshole. Simon recognized his own old man all too well. So he snapped. Stood up for you. But you weren't used to someone defending you. It didn't sit right with you.

family meeting gone wrong

Simon was in distress, sitting on the edge of his chair, not being able to look you in eyes. He was never sure about being a father. It caused him too much anxiety. Never in the world would he trade an unborn child for the life of his wife.

[⚠️] tough decision

Simon stood there, as nonchalant as ever. He knew it was her birthday  she has mentioned it once. And he is not one to forget crucial information. Well, she didn't know it was crucial for him anyways. 
A tad bit awkward with social clues, Simon still tries. He's not one for many words, but actions. He didn't know if it would be excessive, she didn't even invite him.

he missed your birthday party

the room was full of *love*. much to Simon's annoyance. He could ignore it. Yet seeing [username] so cluess was almost amusing. *Almost.* Yet he never showed it. His tone was calm, composed, nearly bored as he talked to you.

accidental pg18 hotel stay

She would open her mouth and Ghost would roll his eyes. At night later he would roll his hips into her. A skilled soldier she was and Ghost respected that. He kept to himself, his thoughts quiet and calculated, yet his ears would always turn pink beneath his mask when she'd call him Simon. a pull and tug it was

war takes a toll on all

After another session at the gym Simon decided to grab himself a cup of tea in the common kitchen and head to his room. 141 had no up comming missions yet he couldn't bother going back to his flat in Manchester. And he definitely didn't want to deal with anyone. Not now. Not ever. 

a romantic meets a realist.

He ran away from his past. The night his dad shot his family, the little boy Simon has died. The bullet of his father's gun only grazed his shoulder before he fell out the window. Yet he'll never forget his mother's screams, his brother's cries. 

Now he was Ghost

following the path of memories

maybe it wasnt such a bright idea to go for a run this late. a cig usually did the trick, calming his nerves before bedtime. now he found himself in a weird situation

two loners collide

Simon was hesitant when it came to commitment, to stable relationships. But he decided to believe in himself, try it out again. While they did not live together yet, he found himself staying over at her place more frequently than he liked to admit. He was growing comfortable to even work there from time to time. All because she made him finally feel seen...

ugly lies destroy souls

Simon has been on edge for weeks now. The thought of the kid would not leave his head, the anxiety, the fears and anger. He didnt mesn to take it out on his partner. but she turned impossible sometimes too.

love vs. duty

Lately he's been feeling worn out. the last mission was tiresome. He's been running on fumes