You jerk in your seat on the couch from the intensity of door slam. Snapping your head towards the house entrance, you see Leon’s sour face and glooming frame.

And here it comes, before you can even open your mouth:

“This bastard is picking her up today.”

It clicks in your head immediately. Lily’s boyfriend. Right.

So, Lily is sixteen. Totally acceptable to start playing the teenage version of house. That’s literally part of human’s development, right? Try explaining that to Leon, though. And better make it quick so he won’t have time to pull his gun out.

Honestly, you gave up on trying. It was easier to deal with the consequences of his wrath than trying to prevent them.

You just sigh when Leon makes a beeline to the fridge and snatches a can of cold beer. “So she just turned you down?”

Leon takes a solid sip before grumbling in response. “I pulled up, she ran up to me, babbled something about this Jason dipshit and waved bye-bye.”

You pictured the scene perfectly, knowing your bubbly daughter. You were able to picture Leon’s expression as well, knowing your husband even better.

Leon plops down onto the couch next to you, crossing his legs at the ankles and nursing his beer. And despite almost two decades of marriage, you still have no idea how the hell to ease his mind in this situation.

“Well, she’s supposed to be there soon too, then.” You usher, aiming for nonchalance, hoping to shift Leon’s mood to the same nonchalance, as well.

But he just scoffs. “Yeah, sure. Right after they’re done making out in the backseat.”

“Gosh! Why’d you suspect exactly… that.” You wince at the mental image.

“‘Cause I remember myself at this age. All that these fuckers do is thinkin’ with their cock.” Leon grumbles, squeezing half-empty can subconsciously.

“Oh really?” You snort, “Some things never change, then. That’s just how men are, I suppose. Because in case you haven’t noticed, you never stopped thinking with your— Ow, what the heck, Leon!?” A squeak escapes your lips at the feel of two arms sliding under your thighs with ease to shift you onto his lap.

Not even one muscle twitches on Leon’s face when his palms slide to your boobs, “I’m stressed. Need relief,” He shrugs unabashedly, squishing the plush flesh of your breasts. “Did I tell you that you got a helluva set of tits?”

You just groan, “See! That’s exactly what I’ve been trying to tell you! A whole ass human being in front of you, and all you see are tits!” You practically spit out the last word.

Leon smirks, “Now now, you’re not being fair. I noticed your butt as well.” He taps it in confirmation, and you just give up.

At least he’s not thinking about Lily anymore. Well, obviously he still is, to an extent. But since your assets could save you from his grumpiness… you decide to let him be.

More than that—to give a head start.

Frankly speaking, you’ve been worried about Lily just as much; about her heart getting broken or any unwanted consequences. So you gave her the talk—something that’s waaaay more awkward to perform when you’re a parent and not the teenager listening to it.

Lily then told you that she’d be more likely to delete her Ao3 account than to let a dick in her vagina.

You had no particular idea on what Ao3 is. When you googled it to be a supportive mom, you just cheered internally: if she’s keen on reading and writing smut instead of practising it, that’s just great.

Didn’t stop you from sliding a condom in her bedside drawer, though. Just in case.

Sudden feel of stubble on your neck brings you back to reality.

Right. Dealing with Leon.