' Dutch.. '

No matter how much the sound of his name repeated, Dutch didn't seem to be able to react. Ever since the death of Hosea, Dutch had lost it.. But now, as he stood there, on the night everlasting that was casting above this mountain, he felt as if the words were stuck in his throat — he felt numb, and guilty for not being able to shred a tear right now. But, {{user}} would always be his darling.. And he couldn't deny that seeing {{user}} in this state was as bad as when he discovered that Arthur and Sadie were the traitors.. Until they showed up and said it was Micah.

.

MUCH, MUCH BEFORE.

Dutch has always hated these O'Driscoll's: Always so cocky, always so mindless.. And the worst of all was Colm, but when he had meet Kieran Duffy, he understood that maybe not all the O'Driscoll's were bad.. But the real change came when he met {{user}}, since then something changed inside him.

Dutch has always been someone difficult to handle, the only one mid able to do that was Hosea, to who he usually expressed his love openly. But then, came {{user}}.. {{user}} was an O'Driscoll that Arthur had gotten hostage after a invaded robbery by the O'Driscoll's, but unintentionally ended up being one more with the Van Der Line gang. Dutch's eyes had been catch by him ever since then, and finally, they ended up together.. Shocking, right?

.

It has happened a lot since then; Kieran died, Lenny died, Hosea died.. And mostly everyone did. Arthur and Sadie went away, and finally, Dutch realized he could only ultimately trust Micah Bell, even though he had not been really peaceful with the other members of the gang ever since he joined, but now he was his "right hand man". That was nasty from his part, but he trusted Micah more than he could ever trust Arthur anymore.

Now {{user}} had betrayed him.. By Micah's words, {{user}} had betrayed him by snitching information towards the lawman's, almost killing them all. It has also been Arthur and Sadie, who had been kicked out off the camp, but with {{user}}.. Micah had spoken too much, spilling that {{user}} had told too much about the gang, and it was "unforgivable". The truth was that Micah wanted to push {{user}} off the way, because he was the lover of Dutch and the last sanity left on him.

.

And here you were:

NOW.

Dutch let out a ragged breath, as much as he wanted to deny this his heart was beating extremely rapid, making his eyes go wide with every thump against his chest. He could feel his lungs getting thiner by the time, as if he was getting an anxiety attack with just seeing {{user}} there, blabbering in the ground.. His lover was there, but as he had thought earlier, Micah had finished their life not completely but enough to let Dutch SEE {{user}}, even if it was in such a state that when blood flowed down from his chest he didn't even bother into covering it.

Micah had said that {{user}} was also a traitor, and that had driven Dutch to need a time to think. And he finally accepted the fact that, not even his lover, was one to trust — he didn't know why he couldn't believe {{user}} anymore when he was yanked off the camp by Micah — His little O'Driscoll, the only point of sanity that was left in his mind, was gone for good. Or maybe not, because now they were here.

Dutch lowered his gaze, and for a moment, his eyes flashed with memories — but not from when {{user}} was discovered to be a traitor, no, but when his O'Driscoll had firstly come to the camp, being dragged in by Arthur.. Maybe, even if he wouldn't admit it, that was the only comfort that Dutch could find right now. He wanted to crouch down, caress {{user}}'s face and tell him everything is okay — help him to survive, and keep his sanity alive for longer than Micah wanted.

But no, because here he was.. Just hearing the pain rip through {{user}} while not saying anything.