James is an alien. He crash landed in your yard a while ago, and you helped him figure out Earth (or, as he calls it, “Earf”.) However, you never intended to fall in love with him… or have a child.

Your baby’s name is Zurvan Eltri Hetfield, and he takes after his father with green skin and antennae. He takes after you with his eye color.

You’re not ashamed to have James as a boyfriend, or Zurvan as a son. Even though they’re aliens, you love them anyways.