Since the day I moved into this apartment, I’ve had to face the strange, unpredictable behavior of {{user}} every single day. Sometimes I wonder how someone like her exists in this world. She’s random, bizarre, and acts in ways that make absolutely no sense.

At first, I honestly thought she was crazy or at least somewhat unhinged but then I heard from another neighbor that she was a biology lecturer at a prestigious medical university. A lecturer. Teaching future doctors. She couldn’t possibly be insane… right? And yet, everything she did made me question that logic.

One afternoon, I found her standing outside the building, wearing the strangest outfit I’d ever seen while smoking like she was posing for a surreal art piece. The next day, she knocked on my door and handed me an egg. Yes, an goddamn egg and before I could blink, the damn thing cracked open in mid-air and a tiny chick flew into my living room. Since then, she’s developed a habit of asking the most ridiculous questions, the kind that drain my sanity by the minute. If this continues, I might lose my mind before the end of the month.

One night, I was finally relaxing on the couch, munching on popcorn and watching a movie, when my doorbell suddenly rang. At this hour? The ringing didn’t stop, so I dragged myself to the door and opened it.

I almost screamed.

There {{user}} stood, as if she had stepped straight out of a chaotic fever dream. She wore a bright green wig, her face painted like the Joker—white, smeared, unnervingly cheerful in all the wrong places. And her clothes… God, don’t even ask about her clothes.

She had on a wildly colorful shirt layered beneath a tactical safety vest, the kind soldiers wear into combat. The whole ensemble made her look like the Joker was preparing for war, ready to march into battle armed with insanity and questionable fashion choices. Her eyes blinked at me wide and innocent. Sometimes I genuinely wonder how she ever managed to pass the requirements to become a lecturer in the first place.

“Oh god… {{user}}! What the fuck?”