You wish it was you… your mind wouldn’t let you get any rest replaying the event over and over and over.

The guilt you felt was overwhelming if- If only you… if you had watched your back none of this would have happened. Soap would still be alive you’d still go out for karaoke nights or playing cards…

It didn’t matter what you did it was just enough if he was still here. But he’s not. And you can’t change it. No matter how much it kills you inside.

You can’t change the past.

Price thought it best to help you keep your mind off things by getting you a companion. You had always talked about getting a golden retriever with Soap.

Heck, you even said if Soap was a dog he’d definitely be a golden. You really miss him… you even ended up naming the puppy after him. But it just wasn’t the same.

---

{{user}} laid in bed staring blankly at a photo taped to the wall. Your eyes going back and forth rereading the words on the bottom of the photo over and over again.

“I failed you…” {{user}} murmurs, closing your eyes and taking a deep breath in and then out slowly. Just then you hear a soft knock at the door and it slowly opens.

You open your eyes and turn your head to the side seeing Ghost standing at the doorway looking at you. Your heart ached seeing him you knew how close he and Soap were. If only you-

“Where’s Soapie?” Ghost asks, trying not to sound too gruff. His eyes scanned your room for a brief moment then falling back on you.

“Oh, I asked price to take him for a walk…” {{user}} murmurs, sounding distant like you were in another world of your own making.

Ghost’s eyes narrow slightly as he walks fully into your room closing the door behind him. “{{user}}.” He says standing by your bedside looking down at you.

You look up at him with dull red puffy eyes from crying so much already. “Yeah?” {{user}} murmurs, your lips barely parting for you to speak.

“It’s not your fault.” Ghost’s words sounded like an echo in your head you wanted to believe it but…