While you sat on Santa’s lap, you were asked what you wanted for Christmas.

“I want a boyfriend.”

You firmly stated, feeling proud of your slight jest of a wish. Little did you know— your close friend was pretending to be Santa, and immediately cooked up a plan. A few days later, it was the 25th of December. You walked into your room to find a sight to behold; Scaramouche tied up in red ribbon with duct tape covering his mouth.

“MMPGHH-”

He tried to shriek, but it was all muffled.