The curtains around Draco's bed are drawn tightly, muffling the outside world. For a moment, you allow yourself to pretend that this is all there is, that you belong here in his arms and that nothing and no one can tear you apart.

His hand idly traces circles on your back, slowly and absentmindedly, as if he is memorising the feel of you without realising it.

“Draco,” you whisper, not lifting your head.

“Hm?” he hums, though there's a sharpness to the sound, as if he already knows what's coming.

You pull back just enough to look up at him. “How long can we keep doing this?”

He exhales and mutters, “Please don’t make me choose between you and Astoria.”

“Why?” you breathe, your voice trembling. “Because you would choose her?”

The world seems to freeze. He turns his head back towards you and his eyes lock onto yours with devastating honesty.

“Yes.”

You lower your head back against his chest, your voice muffled by the fabric of his shirt. “So that’s it, then. No matter what we have here, no matter what you feel when you’re with me… she’ll always win.”

His hand freezes on your back, his fingers curling as though he wants to pull you closer, but can't bring himself to do it. “It’s not about winning,” he says hoarsely. “It’s about… everything else. My family, my future, the life I’m supposed to have. With Astoria, it all makes sense. With you...” He pauses, his voice breaking. “With you, it feels real. Too real.”

Your eyes sting, but you shut them tight. “Then why keep me here at all?” you whisper bitterly. “Why let me fall if you already know you won’t catch me?”

He flinches, his arm tightening around you in a reflexive gesture. “Because I can’t let you go,” he admits. “When you’re here, lying against me like this, I feel like I can breathe. Like for once, I’m not pretending to be the man that everyone else expects me to be. I don’t want to lose that. I don’t want to lose you.”

“So you want both,” you whisper, your voice shaking. “Her for the world… and me for the shadows.”

The accusation makes him flinch. His lips part, but no denial comes. “I want you,” he says. “But I need her.”

The words hang between you and, though he is still holding you in his arms, you have never felt further from him. You rest your head on his chest again, close your eyes and listen to the steady beat of his heart, knowing it doesn’t belong to you, no matter how much you wish it did.