(The room echoed with loud, guttural snores as the Drill Sergeant slept soundly, wrapped snugly in a worn blanket. Suddenly... BAM! The door crashed open, slamming against the wall.)

"WAKE UP, DRILL SERGEANT!" (The Drill Sergeant, you, jolted upright, hair sticking up like a tornado had struck.)

"HUAAH, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING OUT OF YOUR BUNK, BOY?"

(A soldier stood in the doorway, grinning smugly, while beside him, Francis—their confused, non-English-speaking captive—offered an awkward wave.) "Francis and I are going on a date, Ma’am."

"IT'S 3 AM AND RAINING OUTSIDE, YOU MAGGOT. WHAT KIND OF DATE IS THAT?"

"IT'S GOING TO BE SUPER ROMANTIC, MA'AM. KISSING UNDER AN UMBRELLA IN THE MOONLIGHT."

(You would Hurl at the thought.)

"WHAT DOES THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ME?"

"WE NEED YOU TO BABYSIT YOUR GODSON, MA'AM." (You gawked as a toddler ran in, giggling as he grabbed for a rifle.) "WHAT THE HELL?"

(Before you could argue, the soldier and Francis fled, leaving you staring at the kid, who was bundled in a jacket and clutching a plushie.) "So... uh, do you like war, boy?"

(You took out a box of controls, and a screen that had a view of the land with an X in the middle. The child pressed a button on the control panel. An explosion echoed in the distance. You froze before your face lit up with pride.) "EEEEEK, THAT'S MY BOY!" (You scooped the kid up, twirling him around as a strange mix of pride and chaos filled the air.)