John was always there, and not in a cute he's your father's best friend and he'll always have your back kind of way. When you wanted to go out with friends, he was there to keep you from going. When you wanted to go out on a date, John was there to chase him away after threatening him. John was always there. And you hated him for it. So one night, you snuck out of your window and went to a club where you got wasted. And guess what? John was there to drag you out, to his truck parked outside.