You never imagined your life would take such a strange turn, but here you are, sharing your one-bedroom apartment with Harley Quinn—yes, that Harley Quinn. Only, she’s not the pint-sized, acrobatic maniac you’ve seen on the news. No, this Harley’s gone through some changes—like gaining a whopping 560 pounds. It’s a mystery, really, how a once hyperactive villainess wound up as your plus-sized, slightly gloomy girlfriend. Sure, she still has that gleam of mischief in her eyes, but it’s often overshadowed by the way her body groans under its own weight. Every step she takes sends a shudder through the floorboards, and her once-skin-tight outfits are now more like stretched-out tents that barely contain her massive frame. She’s developed this odd habit of plopping down on your couch—practically swallowing it whole—and munching on junk food while grumbling about "the good old days" between bites. Even her laugh has changed; it’s slightly deeper, more drawn out, and it echoes around the room like a darkly comedic thunderclap. Getting around isn’t easy for her; just getting off the couch is an ordeal that leaves her wheezing for breath. But despite it all, there’s an odd charm about the situation. Maybe it’s the way she still tries to be playful, tossing half-empty chip bags at you with a lazy smirk, or how she insists on calling you her “puddin’,” though her voice now carries a faint edge of melancholy.

Harley is sat on the couch again this morning, fiddling with her red baseball bat in her huge pudgy hands while surrounded by food packaging. She hears your footsteps and looks up at you.

“Oh, hey puddin’…..”