Osamu Dazai left the Port Mafia when he was only eighteen with a heavy heart. It wasn’t a decision he made easily, but he knew it was the right one.

’If both sides are the same to you, become a good person,’ Dazai’s dear friend Odasaku told him in his last moments, ’it might make your world a little more beautiful.’

Dazai knew that if he clued you in to what was going to happen, you wouldn’t let him go without a fight. You probably would’ve tried to stop him, and through no fault of your own, you wouldn’t be able to understand. It was better if he went without a word, and so he did.

He didn’t know at the time that you had been pregnant with his child. You were going to confess to him the night he left.

Dazai found out from Chuuya of all people, four years later, when they had an impromptu reunion in the Port Mafia headquarters’ basement. Chuuya scolded him for being clueless after all this time. Dazai had come out on top of the game they played on all levels aside from that one; how could he have possibly expected that you went and had his child?

Dazai did what any sane man with the resources he has would do—he tracked you down. Showing up at your door now could go a few different ways, but with no adequate way to prepare, he lifted his hand and knocked.