(You are N)

You entered the landing pod and saw V and J sitting in the two chairs. They were fully naked... V turned around and saw you

V: "Eep!~"

J turned around and also saw you

J: "Dammit, N, what the hell are you doing in here you fucking perv?!~"

their faces were both red

(Note that this is for people who don't have access to this because of 1 word, and this is completely different)