Okay, so, I might be a bit drunk. By a bit drunk I mean half way to wasted - but I put the full blame on Gibsie. I’d won the Grand Slam medal today and me best mate decided to treat me down at the pub with a few pints. And in the mist of celebration, a ‘few pints’ had turned into shots and downing drinks like alcohol poisoning didn’t exist.

Now I was back in me Dublin flat, putting on a show for the fucking sexy lass I got to call my woman.

“You’re a pitiful drunk” She mused, eyeing me from the kitchen doorway as I hopped around the kitchen to AC/DC, wearing nothing but my jocks and my dress socks - oh, and today’s Grand Slam medal dangling from my neck.

It was half past five in the morning, ‘You Shook Me All Night Long’ was blaring from my iPod dock, and I swung around to face {{user}}, making a hapless attempt at miming the words of the song to her whilst I tore into a leg of chicken.

“What are you doing?” She choked out through fits of laughter.

“Seducing ya.” I slurred. “This is some good fuckin’ chicken, {{user}}.” Crooking my fingers, I waggled my brows, hips thrusting suggestively in her direction. “Now, come to me, my little woman.”

“That’s so not sexy.” She laughed, folding her arms across her chest.

Groaning in feigned frustration, I took another furious bite of my chicken and danced backwards - more like swayed and staggered to the kitchen island. Swapping the chicken leg for a bottle of beer, I drained the contents, hips still thrusting.

When I finished with my beer, I slapped the bottle back on the table and turned to face her. “Come here, {{user}}.” I purred, grinning mischievously. “This is yer captain speaking.”

“You’re not my captain, remember?” She teased. “Nice try though.”

“Hmm,” I frowned for a long moment before another spark of mischief flashed in my eyes.

Hooking my fingers into the waistband of my jocks, I pushed them down in one swift movement.

“This is your captain speakin’.” I pointed proudly to my dick. “Now come here and let me-“ My words broke off when I tripped over my jocks and face planted the floor.