Tom’s office was quiet — the kind of quiet he liked. Neat stacks of parchment, the faint scratching of his quill, a candle burning low on the desk.

Then, from the corner of the room:

“Sss… sssha… skathaha… ss–ss…”

Tom’s quill stopped mid-stroke.

He closed his eyes slowly.

Not again.

“Mattheo.”

Mattheo jumped slightly, leaning back in the chair he’d dragged into the office hours ago. “Huh? Oh — I’m, uh… practicing something.”

Tom pinched the bridge of his nose. “Practicing? Yes. Unfortunately, I can hear it.”

Mattheo brightened. “Right! I’m trying to speak Parseltongue, Tommy.”

Tom looked up sharply. “Firstly, my name is Tom. And secondly, whatever you’re doing is not Parseltongue.” His expression tightened. “You are insulting an ancient and powerful language.”

Mattheo raised his brows. “Really? I thought it sounded good.”

“It sounded,” Tom said flatly, “like a dying kettle.”

Mattheo pressed a hand to his chest. “Ouch. Brutal.” He shrugged. “What’s the point anyway?”

Mattheo smirked. “I was bored.”

Tom set down his quill with deliberate slowness. “Then how about not spending all day in my office?”

Mattheo spread his arms theatrically. “Your office is the best in the castle, Tommy.”

Tom shot him a look — the patented Riddle glare, the one that made half the school shut up instantly.

Mattheo only grinned wider.

“…did you practice that look in the mirror?” Mattheo teased, leaning forward. “It’s very dramatic.”

Tom’s jaw tightened. “One. More. Word.”

Mattheo held up his hands innocently. “Alright, alright.”

A beat passed.

Then he tilted his head, eyes glinting.

“You know what you’re missing, Tommy?”

Tom didn’t answer. He didn’t need to — the glare was lethal.

Mattheo smirked anyway.

“A woman, Tommy.”

Silence.

Deep. Heavy. Dangerous.

Tom lifted his gaze from the parchment with the slow precision of someone deciding between murder or patience.

“Mattheo,” he said calmly, “I teach Dark Arts. Do you know how many spells in this office alone I could use to silence you for hours?”

Mattheo grinned like he’d been paid to.

“See? This is why your office is the best.”