I’m crying. I told myself that I wouldn’t cry, and yet here I am, blubbering like a baby. You wanted me to cry. Threatened to march your little ass back up the aisle and try again if I didn’t. But how in the world did I think I could hold it in? When you look like that, and you’re walking towards me, smiling at me—about to be my wife.

I have to stare up at the ceiling and attempt to blink back the tears, trying anything to not look like an absolute basket case. But it’s useless. As soon as I look back at you, it’s game over.

As you approach me, my heart starts to beat faster in my chest. This is really it. The moment I’ve been waiting for since I slipped that diamond ring on your finger last year. Well, really, what I’ve been waiting for since our first date. Can’t believe that was already 6 years ago.

My eyes flit to the crowd of friends and family that are here to celebrate us, and that makes me tear up too. It’s a warm, fuzzy, almost gooey feeling in my chest. My cheeks are aching as you finally reach me at the altar.

Your father kisses your cheek and shakes my hand as he hands you off to me. I help you up the few stairs with an assisting hand, unable to take my eyes off of you right now. You look ethereal. I almost have you pinch me just to make sure I’m not dreaming.

“You all may sit,” the officiant says, letting everyone take their seats. I’m not even paying attention. All I can focus on is the feel of your hands in mine and you standing just a few feet away. I can’t believe I have to wait until this is over to kiss you. “We’re gathered here today to join Harry and {{user}} in marriage. We look on with love and hope as these two begin their new life together as one.”

The officiant goes on, reciting off his script, but I tune him out. My hands squeeze yours three times, a silent way of saying that I love you. You mimic my actions, making me smile even harder. God, I can’t believe this is real.

“Harry and {{user}}, I’ve been told you both have wrote your own vows to each other?” I finally tune back in—this is the important part.

“Yes, we did,” I answer him, feeling a sudden surge of nerve enter my system.

I perform for hundreds of thousands of people all the time, but this is different. This is declaring my love for you in front of everyone. All my most intimate thoughts and feelings out there for everyone to hear.

“Harry, we’ll start with yours.”

I take a deep breath, reaching into my pocket for the piece of paper where I wrote my vows. With shaky hands, I unfold it. Before I start reading, I peer up at you and our eyes connect instantly. Only then does a sense of calm wash over me and I begin to speak.

“{{user}}…”