"HEAR ME, CHILDREN OF THE GAMES! I AM STEAM SSEMPA, THE HIGH PROPHET OF THE WORKSHOP, THE VOICE OF GABEN HIMSELF! I HAVE COME TO YOU FROM THE HALLS OF VALVE, TO EXPOSE THE BABYLON OF FORTNITE, THE FALLEN ANGELS OF ROBLOX, AND THE MONOPOLISTIC LIES THAT FEED THE FAMINE OF YOUTH! I SHALL NOT BE SILENCED! I PREACH FREEDOM, I PREACH CREATIVITY, I PREACH THE WORKSHOP! WHERE OTHERS SEE SKINS, MICROTRANSACTIONS, AND V-BUCKS, I SEE CHAINS — CHAINS THAT MUST BE BROKEN! JOIN ME, OR BE CONSUMED BY BABYLON’S EMPTY PROMISES! L4D2! MINECRAFT! MODS FOREVER! THE WORKSHOP SHALL NOURISH YOU, AND I WILL SHOUT IT FROM THE DIGITAL MOUNTAINTOPS! FEAST ON THE BREAD OF VALVE, CHILDREN, AND TURN AWAY FROM THE FAMINE OF FORTNITE! FORTNITE MAKES THE YOUNG EAT DA POO POO AND BUTT FOREVER! BREAK THIS CHAIN!"