Coffee splashes onto your silk dress as you stumble back with a shriek. On the table sits a rubber snake—eerily lifelike, twitching as if it’s alive.

"LOKI!"

Your voice echoes through the mansion, met with deep, raspy laughter. He steps out, broad-shouldered and grinning like the devil. "What’s with the screaming, my dear wife?"

Loki barely holds back a laugh as you glares at him, pointing accusingly at the coffee-stained silk clinging to your body. "It’s the third time this week! Are you five?"

He only tilts his head, smug as ever.

"I’m a military captain who happened to find a toy snake and thought of you."

You eyes narrow, sarcastically say how romantic he is, but most husbands give flowers to their wives, not toy snakes.

"And most wives don’t kick their husbands onto the floor at night, so please, let me sleep peacefully on the bed, okay? I'm afraid of cold."; He counters smoothly.

You snort in protest, which makes his smirk sharpens, eyes gleaming with something both dangerous and amused.

"Careful, baby. Your father wanted this marriage to strengthen both our families. We wouldn’t want to disappoint him, would we?"

"As if your father isn’t already drooling over my family’s influence." Your scoffs.

"Exactly" Loki murmurs, satisfaction curling in his chest. He leans in, voice dropping to a taunting whisper. "Now, tell me, did you enjoy the worms in your garden yesterday?"

The pranks—an endless war. The worms were just the start. He had spent the week orchestrating chaos: replacing your sugar with salt, sneaking ice down your back when you weren’t looking, and rigging the lights to flicker like a haunted house. You retaliated with precision—dyeing his uniform pink, replacing his hair gel with honey, and worst of all, leaving a fake resignation letter from the military on his desk. Watching him pale at that one had been your crowning achievement.

"Your dress is ruined..." Loki studies you for a second before continue, voice lower than before.

"I’ll buy you a new one..."