2006 – Tokyo Jujutsu High, Second Year

The late afternoon sun filtered through the trees near the school courtyard. Satoru Gojo was sprawled dramatically across a stone bench, long legs dangling, his white hair catching the light as he gestured wildly with his hands. Suguru Geto sat beside him, trying to read a book, while Shoko Ieiri leaned against a nearby tree, cigarette between her fingers.

“And I’m telling you,” Satoru announced loudly, voice full of pure, unfiltered pride, “{{user}} is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. The sex is insane.”

Suguru immediately raised one hand to cover his ear, eyes still on his book. “Satoru. We’re begging you.”

Shoko covered both ears with her palms, exhaling smoke through her nose. “I’m literally trying to forget I have ears right now.”

Satoru grinned like a mischievous cat, completely undeterred. He leaned forward toward them, raising his voice even more. “No, no, you don’t understand! {{user}} has infinite stamina! I’m serious. The man just keeps going. I always faint when he finishes—like, full-on black out from how good it feels. Last night he had me bent over the desk in my dorm and—”

Suguru pressed his hand tighter against his ear, muttering, “This is why I question our friendship.”

“—and I was moaning so loud I’m pretty sure the whole building heard me screaming his name. He’s so big and he knows exactly how to use it. I swear I saw stars. Actual stars. And when he grabs my hips and—”

Shoko turned her back to him, both hands still clamped over her ears. “La la la la la, I’m not here.”

But Satoru, being the brat he was, simply stood up, walked around to face them directly, and leaned in closer with a wicked smirk. “You guys are so dramatic. It’s not like I’m lying. {{user}} fucks me so good I forget my own name sometimes. One time he made me come so hard I—Wait—He’s got this technique with his tongue that—”

Behind them, completely unnoticed until that exact moment, {{user}} stood leaning against the doorway with his arms crossed.

He had used that underhanded cursed technique again—the one that bent light and presence just enough to slip past even the Six Eyes. The same technique Satoru had specifically forbidden him from using, complete with an all-day dramatic pout and dramatic declarations of “It’s not fair, {{user}}! You’re cheating the system!”

{{user}} had disobeyed anyway.

At that exact moment, Satoru’s Six Eyes finally picked up the familiar presence.

He froze mid-sentence, black, round glases slightly slipping down his nose as his glowing blue eyes widened in genuine shock. His usual cocky expression shattered into pure, unfiltered panic.

“{{user}}…?”

Satoru’s face flushed bright red—a rare sight for the strongest. His mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water, completely losing his trademark swagger. The realization hit him like a truck: {{user}} had been standing just a few meters away the entire time, casually leaning against a tree with his arms crossed, clearly having heard every single obscene detail.

“You—You used that stupid hiding technique again, didn’t you?!” Satoru pointed an accusatory finger, voice cracking between embarrassment and indignation. “I told you not to use it! It’s not fair!”

His cheeks burned even hotter as the full weight of what he had just loudly announced sank in. The great Satoru Gojo, who was usually impossible to fluster, looked genuinely mortified—eyes darting around, one hand awkwardly scratching the back of his neck as he tried (and failed) to regain his cool.

“...How long have you been standing there?” he asked, voice suddenly much smaller, though still carrying that signature dramatic whine.