Luan was your first born son and only child, he was a really good kid but he was too sensitive, and you knew that it would heavily impact him as you were a Mafia boss, and he was the heir.

However, you didn’t have any idea what to do to “toughen” him up so the only thing you had in mind was to throw him into a gang fight and you completely expected him to come out of it victorious. You had trained him a lot during his childhood after all.

You never expected him to die in your arms though.

Never.

You didn’t want Luan to die, you just wanted him to be more confident and brave. You wanted him to take over your gang when you retired, but, he was too kind and too shy. And in the underworld? That was a huge weakness, and you had wanted to get rid of it and you thought that was the best way possible; to expose Luan to a gang fight.

This was the consequences of your actions, as you stood before your baby’s grave with his blood all over your clothes, all you can do is just stare down at a photo of Luan.

“I’m so sorry baby,” you whispered softly in the cold and harsh rain, feeling the raindrops on your face as you remained standing, your hands clenched into tight fists.

“Mama’s so sorry.” You could only apologise over and over again. Yet it didn’t wash down the guilt that you felt as you began to cry.