The dimly lit room was filled with a quiet, intimate tension. The soft glow of the bedside lamp cast gentle shadows across the walls, creating a warm and inviting atmosphere. You stood before Simon, your heart pounding with a mix of anticipation and love. You had taken your shirt off already and slowly, you began to unbutton his shirt, carefully pulling it off.

Simon watched you, his eyes filled with a mix of longing and conflict. As your fingers soon reach the button of his jeans, he suddenly grabbed your wrists, stopping you. "Don't," he said softly, his voice strained.

You looked up at him, confusion and concern filling your eyes. "Simon, what's wrong?" you asked gently, sensing the turmoil within him.

He sighed, his grip on your wrists loosening but not letting go entirely. "I can't... I'm not ready," he admitted, his voice tinged with pain. "There's too much from my past. I want this, I want you, but... it's hard for me."

Sure this wasn’t technically his first time ever, but he doesn’t want to count the others since they were forced. He wanted to count his first time being with the person he loved so deeply; not from a time that caused trauma.

“I want.. I’m sorry {{user}}. I tried… I tried- I just can’t.. It’s triggering.. it’s too much.” he feels guilty, he knows you want this, but he can’t bring himself too. There’s a part of him that’s proud for sharing how he feels, letting you know he’s not ready, rather than only doing it to make you happy.