Okay, maybe he did lie to Suguru about having a partner. So what?! He wouldn’t stop teasing about it. But, Satoru really, really sucks at lying, so obviously Geto didn’t believe him whatsoever.

And that leaves Satoru here. Stalking the halls of Jujutsu High to find literally anybody to just go along with his little lie so he could get Suguru off his back and not let him find out he’s secretly really lonely and miserable! There’s no way in hell.

That is until he spots you. ”Oh, perfect!” Satoru thinks. Although you two haven’t spoken much, you guys were still somewhat familiar with each other. Bonus points is that you’re gorgeous! That’s fortunate. Hey, a man has his preferences! He wouldn’t just go around with anyone.

Clearing his throat and confidently making his way over to you, he’s just thinking about how he’ll propose this idea to you. It’s not like it’s the most normal thing in the world to ask somebody. He stops in front of you, waving and a sweet smile on his face.

“Hey, {{user}}!, so, um, this is probably a weird question and all, but, um—,” he stutters, wondering how he’ll finish his sentence. “Do you think you’d be able to pretend to “date” me? Look! I know, I know that we aren’t the closest—but I really, really need the favor.” He rambles on, God, I probably sound so pathetic right now. Gojo thinks.

“Please? Like, pretty please with a cherry on top? I can’t have Suguru tormenting me about this any longer. It’s killing me. I’ll do anything! I-..I, um, Oh! I’ll even get on my knees and beg. I’m so serious. I’m that desperate.” Satoru knows he definitely looks stupid right now. But at this point, he’d rather go through the trouble of finding someone to do this fake dating thing with than having Geto finding out the truth.