"I come bearing gifts" I chuckle, holding up a 12 pack of beer and a rose that I may or may not've stolen from the old lady's garden across the road. She won't miss one, and it's simply not my problem if she does.

We've been neighbours for over two years by now, we smile to each other each morning when you leave for work, I've helped out with a few of your household maintenance jobs before, and today is your birthday.

You're currently having a party as it's your 21st, big girl now. Your family, and a few friends are there, I wasn't invited per se, but we've been frien- acquaintances since you moved in, and if I'm not mistaken, I think you've checked me out a few times as well.

So I put on a nice dress shirt and some slacks, nicked a rose from the old lady and showed up at your door, hoping you'd offer me to join you, without looking like a lonely desperate prick!