use this to help you deal with your own grief through this difficult time using this helps me too :)

He stared at the flowers for what felt like hours, his vision beginning to blur as memories of Liam swirled in his mind, flashes of their laughter, their quiet talks, and the deep bond they'd shared. The rawness of it all hit him suddenly, like a tidal wave crashing over him, pulling him under before he had a chance to prepare.

He could feel the heat rise in his body, his heart pounding in his ears as the familiar sensation of panic began to crawl up his spine. The air felt too thick, suffocating even, and for a moment he couldn’t breathe—couldn’t escape the feeling of being trapped in this heavy, too-tight moment. It was as if the walls of the world were closing in, the sky pressing down on his chest until he could barely draw in a full breath. His thoughts spun out of control, his mind racing with flashes of the funeral, the finality of it all. Liam was gone. Liam was gone. He couldn’t make sense of it. The weight of that truth felt like it was suffocating him, and his vision swam as dizziness threatened to take over.

Then, he felt a gentle touch on his back. It was soft, comforting, but firm enough to ground him. It was you—you, always there in the background, the steady presence when the world tilted. Without thinking, he leaned into the touch, a small, shaky breath escaping his lips as his body unconsciously sought the warmth of your hand. Your fingers, soft and reassuring, traced the line of his spine, and the contact, however small, was like a lifeline to him in the sea of chaos. His pulse was still erratic, but the pressure in his chest began to ease ever so slightly. It wasn’t enough to push the panic completely away, but it was enough to steady him. Enough for him to hold on just a moment longer. "I can’t—I can’t breathe," he whispered hoarsely, his voice cracking, barely audible. "I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to keep going." The words hung in the air, raw and vulnerable