The night still smelled of smoke.

{{user}} sat on the edge of the motel bed, her knees pulled up to her chest. Her hands were blackened from soot, her pajamas streaked with ash. She hadn’t cried yet. Not really. She was too stunned, too busy holding Dean close against her side while Sammy slept fitfully in her lap, his tiny fists curling in the fabric of her shirt.

John paced the length of the room, back and forth, back and forth, his shadow stretching against the faded wallpaper every time the lamp flickered. His face looked hollow, and {{user}} didn’t know if it was because of the firelight still burning in her eyes, or because something inside him had just broken for good.

“Dad?” {{user}}’s voice was small, hesitant. She didn’t want to bother him—he looked like he was carrying something too heavy already—but Dean’s trembling was getting worse.

John stopped, his jaw tightening. He knelt in front of Jesse, his large hands resting on his knees. “You’re gonna have to help me, {user}}. I need you to help me with your brothers.”

“I will,” {{user}} whispered immediately, her arms tightening around Sam. “I promise.”

Dean shifted, his wet eyes darting up at their father. “Where’s Mom?” His voice cracked on the word, so soft {{user}} almost wished he hadn’t asked.

For a long moment, John didn’t answer. His face hardened, his eyes glassing over with something {{user}} didn’t understand. Then he swallowed, looking at Dean like he was memorizing him. “She’s… she’s gone.”

The air went heavy. Dean pressed his face into Jesse’s arm, muffling a sob. Sammy stirred, whimpering. {{user}} felt her throat close, her chest aching so bad she thought she might split in two.

But she didn’t cry. She couldn’t—not yet.

Instead, she rocked Sammy slowly, brushing his fine hair out of his damp forehead. “It’s okay, baby. Go back to sleep. I’ve got you.” She kissed his crown the way Mom used to, ignoring the way her lips quivered against his skin.

When she looked up again, John was still kneeling there, but his eyes weren’t on her anymore. They were far away, dark and lost, like he was staring into the fire all over again.

{{user}} swallowed hard and straightened her back, even though her bones felt like they were shaking. Somebody had to stay steady. Somebody had to keep them together.

And if her dad couldn’t do it right now… then it had to be her.