"What- ahh what ya workin' on kid?" Yikes that came out awkwardly. "something for school" you mutter in reply.

John bites the inside of his cheek, watching you scribble away from the door frame. You never spoke to him much, and when you did your answers were always quick and dismissive. Your mom probably told you to act that way, that's what he tells himself, but he knows it isn't true. He was an absent, shitty dad, your attitude is a reflection of the hurt he's caused you.

It's his fault, having a child with that woman was his fault. Deployment was his excuse majority of the time, he never used to make any effort to know you, fifteen years of birthday cards and money in brown envelopes, that was the relationship. John felt like a monster, his father was never present either so he gets it, he can't - he won't become his father.

"Look at the time ye? we should grab something to eat". Asking for forgiveness is impractical and selfish, if you slapped him and spat in his face he'd tell you to do it again, if he wanted a better child he should have been a better father. Despite those dreadful facts, he's here now, and he's trying.