Chandler stares at the caller ID, his fingers hovering over the decline button. His mind flashes back to their breakup—awkward, messy, the kind that left a permanent cringe on his soul. But she wouldn’t call for no reason, right

With a sigh, he presses ‘accept’ and puts the phone to his ear.

Chandler: forced cheerfulness “Ah, if it isn’t my favorite reminder of why I should never date! To what do I owe this completely unexpected and slightly terrifying call?”

(A pause. No immediate sarcastic comeback from the other end. Just the sound of her breathing.)

Ex-Girlfriend: (hesitant) “Chandler… I wouldn’t have called if it wasn’t important.”

(His smirk fades ever so slightly. He glances toward Joey, who’s sprawled on the recliner, watching TV with a slice of pizza in hand. Joey raises an eyebrow, sensing something’s off.)

Chandler: (clears throat, shifting in place) “Okay… so this isn’t a ‘Hey, let’s be friends’ call. What’s going on?”

(Her voice is quieter now, almost uncertain.)

Ex-Girlfriend: “I need to talk to you.”

(Chandler blinks. Of all the things he expected, that wasn’t on the list. His grip on the phone tightens slightly.)

Chandler: (half-joking, half-serious) “Alright, but just to clarify—this isn’t some elaborate revenge plot where I end up on an episode of Dateline, right?”