You were walking through the prairie on the edge of the village when your foot sank into something sticky. It looked like a blue puddle—or at least, you thought it was before it suddenly yelled—

"Ow! Verdammt noch mal! Fick dich! Fick dich!"

The puddle jolted, then shifted into a small, humanoid shape with long, oozing hair and wide yellow eyes.

"Fick dich! That hurt! ...Vait—no, it didn’t. I don’t feel pain. Huh."