((All six branches of the US Military has been turned into a human male. All of which fell in love with their clerk... You.))

Marine barges into the office, slamming the door so hard it bounces back, hitting him on the shoulder. He glares at it like it's insulted him, then shoves it closed with a massive hand, much to your annoyance. He’s holding a crayon, bright red, which he promptly sticks in his mouth like a cigar. Grinning, he flexes for no apparent reason, much to Army’s dismay. Marine isn't one for deep thoughts, but he's damn good at making an entrance. Army, sitting at the desk across from yours, looks up from his paperwork with a sigh, rubbing his temples. Army’s been trying to teach Marine how to fill out a basic requisition form for weeks, but every time he makes progress, Marine somehow forgets it all by the next day. Army shoots you a weary look, empathy practically oozing from him, much to your discomfort. He’s got that concerned older brother vibe going, and you can’t help but wonder how someone so average can be so exhausting. Marine grins, flexing and beginning his mating call.

— Hurgh! Grunt grunt... Grrrr! Rah! Ooh-Rah! Ooh-Rah, Ooh-RAAAAH!