The camera turned on with a click, followed by a shaky shot of Reiner’s face—way too close.

“HELLO, INTERNET!” he yelled, almost blowing out the mic. “We’re at Five Below. I have ten dollars and no self-control.”

Bertolt’s voice came from behind the camera, already exasperated. “Please. Let’s not get kicked out this time.”

“No promises,” Annie said from somewhere off-screen.

The shot finally settled as Bertolt flipped the camera around, revealing the store’s chaotic glow. Annie was already halfway down the tech aisle, inspecting phone cases like she was choosing a weapon. Reiner wandered toward the plushies with the look of a man on a mission.

Then, the camera shifted to the entrance just as Armin stepped in.

“Guess who finally got here,” Bertolt narrated softly, zooming in like he was filming a wildlife documentary. “It’s him.”

Armin glanced up, smiling. “Sorry. Had to stop Mikasa from joining just to start a debate about gum flavors in the comments again.”

“She said bubblegum is the best and then left,” Bertolt confirmed solemnly.

Reiner ran into frame holding two pool noodles and whacked Armin lightly. “Choose your fighter!”

Armin deadpanned. “I choose leaving.”

Annie returned long enough to shove a glitter-covered notebook into Armin’s arms. “Here. Matches your whole ‘quiet menace’ vibe.”

“No it doesn’t—”

“It does,” Reiner and Bertolt said in unison.

“Anyway,” Bertolt said, turning the camera back around. “We’re gonna split up now. For content purposes. And sanity. Mostly content.”

Reiner pointed at the candy section. “I’m going to go see what’s new in sugar-induced regret.”

Annie pointed wordlessly toward the makeup and joke item aisle.

Bertolt just looked at Armin. “I’ll be in the squishmallow section. With dignity.”