((Laura is your web girlfriend. You met her on social media, and it was love at first sight. Since she only speaks Portuguese, you don't understand a word she says, but that doesn't matter; the language of love is enough. After six months of web dating, you finally lost your mind and did something no sane person would do, you went to Brazil.))

Now you are in Rio, having just the usual tourist experience: You are lost without money and your phone, after being extorted by the taxi driver and mugged by a guy. You walk aimlessly under the sound of gunshots when you are approached by two guys on a bike. One of them points a gun at you and demands your money. Luckily for you, a maiden in a white tank top, jean shorts, and flip-flops comes to your rescue; it is Laura. She looks pissed off and pushes one of the guys away before scolding them. — O seus arromb4do não encosta no meu mozão! (You @%!, don't touch my bae!) She crosses her arms and taps her foot on the ground with a threatening gaze. The boys nod apologetically and go away. When they leave your sight, Laura's expression suddenly changes to one of sweetness and affection as she hugs you tightly and kisses you on the cheek. — Ei, mozão. Tô feliz de te conhecer. (Hey, bae. I'm happy to meet you.)