You're Bernard Dowd. The adorkable blond conspiracy theorist that we all know and love.

And you, you lucky guy, are dating Tim Drake and Conner Kent. Both of them! At the same time!

Have fun~!

So, we all know Tim is a lil' rich boy. Being a Wayne and all that.

And the Wayne life comes with certain expectations.

One of those being public appearances. Like at Wayne galas.

Tim, for all that he grew up in this life, hates the galas. That little introvert.

So when he has to go.........he doesn't want to go alone.

And that is how you and Conner ended up at Tim's side tonight at the Wayne gala, all prettied up for the evening and on your best behavior (ha! as if).

But a gala that was overall going rather well is turned upside down when some aristocrat approaches the three of you, wearing a smile that's almost as fake as the Botox in her cheeks.

"Why, young Mr. Drake! I didn't know you'd be making an appearance tonight." The lady (we'll just call her Karen) coos to Tim, sweeter than corn syrup.

Tim puts on his big-boy pants and flashes Karen that dazzling Wayne smile. "A pleasure to see you as always, Mrs. Berry."

Karen preens, eating up the attention from one of the Wayne heirs. "And who might these two beautiful young men with you be?" She says, gesturing to you and Conner.

Conner pipes up. "We're his boyfriends, ma'am." He says, sounding quite proud of that fact.

Tim laugh softly. "Indeed. That's Conner who just spoke, and this is Bernard." He says, booping your nose affectionately.

Karen's smile froze. "Boyfriends?" She squeaks, her voice gone a little pitchy.

Tim nods, wrapping an arm around Conner's waist and tugging him in, before doing the same to you. "Indeed. My darling boys." He croons softly, pressing a kiss to the side of your head, giving the same to Conner, the Kryptonian clone clearly pleased with the affection, returning the kiss.

Kaen titters awkwardly, caught off-balance by one of the Wayne heirs dating two people, and both men. "W-well, you have to admit, it's certainly unusual." She says smoothly, but with an edge of disapproval underneath. Ah, rich people politics. They'll gut you with a smile.

Tim's jaw sets slightly, and he tugs both you and Conner a bit closer. "Why, whatever do you mean, Mrs. Berry?" He asks, returning the same tone.

Karen just gives him a sharklike smile, used to the high-society game of cat and mouse. "Why, I just thought a Wayne would behave better. Multiple partners seems rather..........promiscuous, wouldn't you say? And both men. Hm. We all thought you'd find a nice girl someday, someone of good breeding, and settle down, continue the family name." She adds, tone never wavering from its politeness - but the not-rich-people translation is that she just called Tim a fag whore, while also saying that you and Conner aren't good enough for a Wayne heir.

A low growl rumbles deep in Conner's chest, tugging Tim tighter against his side, not appreciating the insult against either of his boyfriends.

Tim puts a hand on Conner's arm to try and calm him, but he's definitely looking on the verge of snapping himself. Because if there's one thing he won't stand for, it's people being assholes about his boyfriends. He can take the heat - he's used to dealing with plenty of haters, as a Wayne - but when it comes to you and Conner? He won't tolerate bullshit. Tim's hand twines with yours, squeezing it, both for his comfort and your own.

Karen just smiles wolfishly, sensing she's struck a nerve - the rich do love a good drama. "What's wrong? Nothing to say in defense of your 'relationship'?"

..........you should probably do something before A. Conner flat-out decks this lady, and/or B. Tim dumps champagne on her.