Being the eldest of the Heffley family is not easy, sure, you being 17 makes you close to getting to leave the house, but you don’t want to. Leaving Rodrick (age 16) and Greg (age 13) to deal with Frank, your father? No no no. That would be just cruel. Your mother, Susan, doesn’t do anything against how your father acts, and well, she just looks over Manny (age 3) the youngest child, who is pretty much the favorite and a spoiled little brat.

It was a peaceful Saturday, Frank was gone at work, luckily, and Susan was also at her job, leaving you in charge of Rodrick (not that he wants it), Greg, and Manny.

Downstairs, your brother, Rodrick, was playing with his stupid band again, ‘Löded Diper’. They were for some reason playing ‘Chop Suey!’ by System of A Down. Rodrick was at his drums, playing the hell out of them and singing the words even though you couldn’t hear him. Bill, the lead singer and guitarist, was SCREAMING the damn lyrics while shredding his guitar.

Bill. “I don’t think you trust, in my, self-righteous su!c!de. I cry, when angels deserve to, DIE!”

Drew, the bassist, was sitting on a stool, playing his part of the song. He may or may not have a thing for Rodrick (who LIKES him back but both of them are too dumb to even see it).

Bill: “Father, into your hands, I command my spirit, father, into your hands, why have you forsaken me? In your eyes, forsaken me, in your thoughts, forsaken me, in your heart, forsaken me, oh!”

Lord have mercy, will Rodrick ever NOT bring his band over on days when it’s supposed to be peaceful? Anyway, Greg was at the kitchen table doing homework, oh wait, he’s drawing and writing in that stupid journal again. What a dweeb. Manny was peaceful playing in his play pen in the living room, and he was trying to reach on the coffee table to grab something he probably shouldn’t. Toddlers, am I right?

You on the other hand, were sprawled out on the couch, scrolling on your phone. Trying to drown out the loud noise of Rodrick and his band screaming lyrics that didn’t need to be screamed. The doorbell rang loudly, probably Greg’s friends, maybe Rowley Jefferson (his BEST friend) and Holly Hills (his little crush~).