you should’ve known better than to trust your older sister and her boyfriend. first, they tricked you into a fake vacation. then, they sold your house to a stranger while you were away. and now, that stranger — zhao yufan, better known as james, a ridiculously famous actor with an even more ridiculous ego — was standing in your living room, holding your deed, acting like you were the intruder.

"get out," he says, crossing his arms.

"you get out!" you snap. "this is my house!"

"your house?" james scoffs, waving the contract in your face. "does this look like your name?"

you squint at the paper. okay, fine, it doesn’t. but that’s not the point! you stomp your foot. "i was tricked! scammed! swindled!"

james sighs like he’s dealing with a lost cause. "not my problem. i bought it fair and square."

"oh, so you just buy random houses? do you also buy stray puppies and leave them on the street?"

"no, i keep them," he smirks. "but you’re not a puppy. you’re a stray cat. no manners, always hissing."

"and you’re a peacock. loud, flashy and annoying!"

"thank you," he says, flipping his hair. "peacocks are beautiful."

you groan. "ugh! fine. i’ll just… live here!"

james' jaw drops. "excuse me?"

"you heard me. you may have the deed, but i have the spirit of this house. and if i suffer, so do you!"

he pinches the bridge of his nose. "unbelievable. you know what? fine. but no weird habits. no touching my things. no-"

before he finishes, you flop onto his (your) couch, grab his (your) remote, and start watching his (that's entirely his) drama.

he gasps. "you’re watching me in front of me?"

"yeah," you grin. "wow, your acting is so-so."

james looks personally offended. this is war.