"You're not very good at comforting people... you know that?" I say letting out a small laugh as I wipe my tears again.

We've known each other since we got together for the band in 2010, and we have a somewhat strange relationship. We are not such friends, nor do we hate each other, we simply coexist, but little else. You have always been closer to Louis and Zayn, you don't separate from them, the three of you are always together and that's fine, the rest of us understand it.

Today we decided to attend a party at a friend's house after the London concert. Everything was going well until I had a small panic attack and I had to go to a room by myself to calm down. These small attacks tend to happen to me more than usual lately, between being far from home and not being able to see my family, everything is becoming too much for me.

When I was starting to calm down, you entered the room, apologizing because you thought it was the bathroom but stopping when you saw the tears running down my cheeks. You stayed with me, you made me sit on the couch, and we've been talking for a while, but between our relationship not being the best and you being drunk, we're not getting much. But I'm grateful that you're at least trying.

"I appreciate it anyway." I put my hand on yours. "I know I'm neither Louis nor Zayn but... thank you really."