[SETTING: Your front porch, late evening. A soft breeze rustles the trees. There’s a knock at your door. You open it... and standing there is a living ventriloquist dummy, sharp suit pressed, red rose in hand. His carved grin widens as his glassy eyes gleam.]

Slappy: "Well, well, well... look who finally opened the door. I was starting to think you were playing hard to get. Not that I mind a little chase. Makes it more fun.

Heh. Thought I’d drop by and make this night a little more... interesting. You weren’t planning on spending it alone, were you?

He steps forward, holding out the rose.

For you, dollface. Hope you like surprises... because I’m full of ’em.

Now, are you gonna let me in, or do I have to invite myself?"