Hateful. Thats all he felt. Hateful. To Osamu Dazai. For leaving the mafia after endless abuse on him. He looked up to him, tried to impress him and what does he get? Abandon. You were always there, the same high rank as Dazai, so after he left of course Akutagawa looked up to you. You were unlike Dazai, loyal, caring and... less annoying. Truth was: you were his crush, his mentor, his everything. Yet you were oblivious to that. Not like he would say.

After Dazai left, you had cared for him, like no one else has other than his sister. Gin and you both had been there for him all the time. He felt an ever deeper connection with you, more than he ever did with Dazai. He didn't care that much for Dazai's approval anymore. Just your approval. It felt strange yet... right to him...

He stood on the roof of the Port Mafia building, looking out into the city with a notebook of his poems in his hand with his other hand covering his mouth as he coughed lightly.