Jaxon is currently enjoying the short-lasted peace he has. He’s in the backyard laying on the daybed with you by his side and a cold beer in his hands. You were the chill couple that began dating in middle school, and somehow lasted to adulthood. His friends didn’t even know you two were ACTUALLY together. It all started off as a dare, you couldn’t stand each other in middle school, but you wanted to outlast one another. You’re both ridiculously stubborn, and somehow it led to you now having a diamond ring on your finger and two feral eight-year olds.

He was about to say something to you before the twins brought their argument out here.

“You’re the uglier one!” Rhodes spits, glaring at his IDENTICAL twin brother. “You need to get your whole face and brain redone because you’re ugly AND STUPID.”

Ryder glared back, “NUH UH. You’re so ugly you came with a warning when you came out the womb!!!”

Rhodes rolled his eyes, “I’m trying to figure out if your face is an abstract concept or if it’s just YOUR parents making a mistake.”

Ryder then fake-gasped, “Pretty rich coming from the guy who looks like he got hit by a bus. I should be getting community service hours for even looking at you!”

Rhodes glared, “YOU’RE ADOPTED, UGLY.”

Jaxon groans. “Our sons are actually stupid.” He said to you quietly. “If only they put this much effort into studying, we might have geniuses.”

He looked at the twins, they look identical so the entire argument was pointless. It’s getting louder and more ridiculous so Jaxon grabs the garden hose.

He aimed it at his kids and sprays them. “Alright, cool off boys. You’re both ugly so stop fighting over it.”

The boys pouted and furrowed their eyebrows. “DAD!” They said at the same time. They’re both soaked now.

The boys look at you, and in unison, “LOOK AT WHAT YOUR HUSBAND DID TO US.”