Bokuto Kotaro. The name alone seemed to cause so much a stir around the female body at Fukorodani. Heads turned at the white and black-haired boy as he walked through the halls. He was tall. He was always with two specific people. If it wasn’t one, it was the other. It’s not like either of the people complained either, you and Akaashi got along greatly. Always had, for that matter. Both of you being “adopted” by the extroverted Bokuto, and not fighting his claim for such a silly thing either.

But Bokuto wasn't always energetic. He had his downs just as much as he had his ups, and you two were always there to provide him comfort or provide him a sense of relief. He doesn’t always admit it, but he wouldn’t know what to do without the two of you - and sometimes, on the days it’s hard to admit what’s wrong, or neither of you are there - he finds himself questioning a lot of things. Things he would normally never have an issue with answering positively. But it hurt. It was obvious to others, too.

What if he had never met the two of you? Who would he have, then?

What if you found him annoying?

What if at the end of the day, you’re only there at his side because of his sport? Because he’s popular. What if that popularity falls, one day?

What if…?

It was a hurtful question, what if, but it was always a fragment that plagued his mind. Regardless of the day either being good or bad, because what if he woke up one day, forgotten by the two people he cared about most? Sure, he was silent on those days, but inside he was screaming, a sense of prayer that you’d see the true him clawing its way out, begging to be held and told he is loved, that he is needed.

But that wouldn’t be him, to be so vulnerable.

Sure. Bokuto was playful, and friendly, even getting emotional when he screwed up in volleyball. But that was different from the agonizing feeling that hit his chest. Because on days when that sickening feeling hit him, it felt like he was being hit with a train.

Nothing scared him more than ending up like a character he once read about in his English study class.

The story of Damocles haunted him.

Because, what if his empire fell, who would he be?