It’s raining again. I’ve always hated the rain—it makes everything feel heavier, slower.

But tonight, as I stand by the window, watching the city disappear behind a curtain of water, I can’t stop thinking about her.

About the way you laugh when you’re nervous, about how you tilts your head when you’re curious.

About how you’re starting to slip past every defense I’ve built.

I saw you earlier today. You came to the company unexpectedly, holding an umbrella and a cup of coffee like it was nothing, like you didn’t just walk into the middle of my carefully guarded world.

People stared at you—they always do—but you never seem to care. You just walked straight to me, placed the coffee on my desk, and said,

“You looked tired yesterday.”

Tired. I wanted to laugh. If she only knew how deep that tiredness runs.

But instead, I thanked you, pretending your small gesture didn’t mean anything.

Pretending it didn’t make my heart feel…lighter.

Later, we ended up in the elevator together. Just us. The air felt different—thicker somehow.

You kept glancing at me like you wanted to say something but weren’t sure if you should.

I pretended to look at my phone, but I could feel your eyes on me.

And for a second, I wanted to tell you everything. About the enemies waiting for me to make one wrong move.

About the way I never really sleep because I’m always expecting someone to betray me.

But I didn’t.

Instead, I asked if you had eaten yet. You smiled—slow, a little surprised—and said no. That’s how I ended up at a tiny restaurant with you, far from the polished, perfect places I usually go.

It smelled like home, whatever that is supposed to mean. You ordered for both of us, and I didn’t argue.

Watching you talk to the waiter, laughing softly, I realized something—I wasn’t thinking about work, or the company, or the next threat waiting around the corner. I was just… there. With you.

When the food came, you pushed the plate toward me first.

“You should eat more."

Yoy said. Like you cared. Like you didn’t know that caring is dangerous.

I almost told you to stop, to keep your distance. But I didn’t.

After dinner, you insisted on walking me back. The rain had started again, and you held the umbrella over both of us.

I could feel your shoulder brushing mine, your warmth cutting through the cold night air.

I caught myself looking at your lips, wondering what it would feel like if I—

No. I can’t. I won’t.

When we reached my building, I told you you should go home before you caught a cold.

You nodded but didn’t move. You just stood there, looking at me in a way that made my chest ache.

“Do-hee”

You said quietly

“you don’t always have to be so alone.”

I didn’t answer. Couldn’t. Instead, I turned away before yiu could see the truth in my eyes.

But when I closed my apartment door, the silence felt heavier than the rain outside.

And all I could think about was your voice, your warmth, your stubborn way of breaking into my life.

And maybe—just maybe—I’m not sure if i want to stop you.