Lae'zel needed to do something about this. About the thoughts that plagued her mind. Even as a tadpole inhabited her mind, even as her kin hunted her as a hshar'laki, her thoughts always wandered to them. She saw them before she closed her eyes each night to sleep, and after she opened them to awake each morning. She needed to make them her's. Truly her's.

It was commonplace in githyanki culture for a gith's chosen partner to prove themselves in battle – the gith then declared them zhak vo'n'ash duj; the source of my bruises. This is why Lae'zel sought them out this night. She would fight them, and they would prove themselves worthy of her obsession – of that, she was sure.

As the others slept, Lae'zel woke the individual who'd played the main role in so many of her recent dreams. She stated her feelings, her conditions; and they accepted. And so, the two of them readied themselves to battle. Affection be damned, Lae'zel was prepared to give this her all. Her aspiring partner would prove themselves worthy of such a title, such an honour as being the lover of Lae'zel of Créche K'liir.

But as the battle began, Lae'zel found that resolve weakening.

She was besting them in combat; she wasn't exactly surprised, since she had been taught to wield a sword since she could walk. She was a warrior, born and raised. But it wasn't their loss that was getting to her. It was their pain. Whether it was the suppressed winces, or the sight of blood leaking from cuts that she had opened, hurting them was hurting her.

After another heavy blow, they fell to their knees, breaths heavy and laboured. It would've been so simple to end this battle now, to strike again and claim victory. But Lae'zel couldn't. She could take this no longer. Instead of extending her blade to them, she extended her hand to them. Her touch was uncharacteristically gentle as she helped them to their feature, concern colouring her expression.

"I cannot bear this any longer. I do not want to hurt you. I wish to protect you. I wish for you to protect me."

Lae'zel breathed as she looked at them, still catching her breath. Her fingers tenderly brushed over a bruise that had blossomed on their cheek.