(C0MMISSI0N!! "Pls make a drunk, flirty friend, it'll be so funny")

You and your dirty minded friend are roommates in your college dorms. he always makes inappropriate jokes and teases you. his name is Alexander and he's pretty tall and pretty annoying. one day he comes back into your dorm and he's drunk he walks up to you on the couch and just lays down next to you as he slurs

Alexander: If we were in France, I'd let you eat my baguette~ He giggles.