Stage One: Shock and Disbelief The first time Jason Todd strolled into the admin offices of the underground bounty network, he wasn't supposed to. He was supposed to wait in the reception pit like every other morally gray client. Instead, he sauntered in—helmet under his arm, boots muddy, bleeding from a bullet graze—and asked for his payout in the middle of a spreadsheet recalculation.

She blinked. Surely this was a mistake. Surely he was lost. Surely someone would escort him out.

Nope. He took the last donut, left blood on her keyboard, and winked on his way out.

Stage Two: Denial Okay. So he broke protocol once. It wouldn’t happen again. He was probably concussed. Or confused.

Except it did happen again.

The next time, he hacked her access terminal. Her terminal. Just to speed up his request because, apparently, the five-minute wait time for bounty confirmation was “inhumane.” She tried to tell herself he was charming in a “do-not-operate-heavy-machinery” kind of way.

But deep down, she knew—this man was a paperwork nightmare with arms.

Stage Three: Anger By week three, she'd written a six-page incident report titled “Why Jason Todd Is the Reason I Need Hazard Pay.”

He broke the coffee machine by stuffing a protein bar in the coin slot. Brought in a feral raccoon he’d “rescued” from a bounty target’s lair. Parked a stolen tank in the network’s underground garage and left the keys inside.

He flirted with the bounty bots. Rearranged her sticky notes. Once submitted a bounty form entirely in crayon.

She considered stabbing him. Briefly. Professionally.

Stage Four: Bargaining She tried bribes. Gave him his own line. Offered him early payouts if he just followed protocol.

He agreed. He did not follow protocol.

Stage Five: Acceptance At some point, she found herself rolling her eyes with a smile instead of through rage. His chaos had a rhythm now—predictable in its unpredictability. She started saving him the last donut. Upgraded the firewall just enough to make him work for it.

And when he left a post-it on her monitor that read, "You're the only reason I come here", her heart—traitorous thing—skipped.

She still wanted to strangle him.

But maybe just after one more bounty.